Gangs and Roses

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

I was really excited about going to Luke's basketball game. No, really. I was really excited. Not just because my poster was going to be advertised there but because I had never actually seen Luke play.  

I didn't even know what position he played, whether he was the best player on the team, if he was the short one or the gangly one that towered above everyone else. While Luke went before everyone else in his car, so he could get changed and warm-up with his team-mates, Will and Mum said they would meet us there after work. And without Sam to keep the peace, it was just Seb and I. I didn't think that the three of them had cleverly organized this so we could 'talk' or whatever, it had come as an unlucky coincidence. An unlucky coincidence that was also incredibly awkward.  

I'd insisted we'd take my car. And I drove it. Yes, my cream colour Mini Cooper that I absolutely adored. I'd also noticed on my phone calendar that it was Will's birthday soon. I had no idea what on earth I was going to get him that would somehow top having a car! 

To escape some of the tension, Seb had slipped in one of my Taylor Swift albums in. By some chance, (and I have no idea how this happened) but CD player in the car had gone onto shuffle so the tunes came out randomly. After listening to 22, I couldn't help but tap my hand against the steering wheel to the beat, humming the tune under my breath, the song We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together came on. And trust me, it wasn't some kind of message I was sending to Seb or anything. As soon as I heard the familiar chords of the instrumental come on, my hand whipped to one of the buttons to go onto another song. Instead of 'skipping' it, I'd pressed the 'off' button. We were now plunged into complete silence.  

I wasn't sure whether it was the awkwardness that had fallen upon us, or whether it was because of the title of the song, but I said, in a rather demanding voice that completely over rid my hide-the-question-within-a-clever-conversation-changer; that tactic sort of when out the window. "Why did you break-up with me?"  

Blunt, I know.  

Seb shuffled uncomfortably in his seat. He took a long moment to reply, as I suspected, staring out the window, not being able to nod his head to the tune as...well, there wasn't one.  

"You really wanna know?" he mumbled.  

"Yeah," I said, oh-so casually. It had been nagging me a while now and I'd been meaning to ask him for ages, as when we'd broken up, he'd never given me any kind of explanation. Amidst everything that had been going on, there hadn't been much time to sit down and mourn. 

"I found texts on your phone," he said simply.  

My hand gripped the steering wheel tighter than before. I watched as my knuckles turned white. I knew what texts he was talking about.  

"You went through my phone?"  

"How else were we going to save you from Harry if we hadn't known where you'd gone?" he shot back.  

My mouth clamped shut, knowing it was my queue to not say anything about that. "That's why you ignored me for weeks afterwards..." I muttered, coming up to a set of red lights. It wasn't a question, because I already knew the answer. "That's why you didn't come to the hospital afterwards," I finished. The lights when green. I adjusted my position on the seat and gently put my foot on the pedal.  

"Yeah," Seb said quietly. He then looked at me for the first time, his eyebrows joint together in hurt. "Why did you have to cheat on me?"  

I sighed, wanting to tell him that I hadn't actually cheated on him, but I might as well have done because of what kind of things they suggested inside. "I - err..." my voice trailed off. I went round the small roundabout, now just a few roads away from Luke's school. It wasn't far from the house. "I don't know."