Wrong Time Right Girl

12: Little Time

Clair-

Billie has a interview today, and I'm going. Not sure if I want to or not, but I'm am going because she wants me to. I haven't had a lot of social interactions since I left the asylum..and so that hasn't been very helpful. 

There will be a lot of people there, and my anxiety will not be easy on me, I already know. 

But before we go Maggie wanted me to take a shower, I don't know if she was hinting onto something..but yea.  I mean, I know I haven't taken a shower in a while, I'm failing on my cleanliness. But hey, Billie hasn't said anything about it. And I know if I stank she would say something. That's just her, and she does not hold anything back. 

So right now I'm getting the shower ready, even though she is a girl but with you know...she has a lot of guy soaps...how the fuck am I supposed to clean myself. I am not gonna use guy soaps. I'm not trying to smell like a dude. On Billie, its sexy..on me, it's just weird.  

Letting the water warm up, I get undressed. Not wanting to see myself I stay away from the mirror. My body, yes has grown since the last time Billie has seen it. But I was 15, I'm 18 now. Curves have grown and my body matured. But due to my past and everything my belly is skinny. In the asylum you could see my ribs, and you still can. But not as bad. I'm still ashamed by it though. 

So not looking in the mirror I take off the last item if clothing, I throw them into the bin we have for clothes in here. And step into the shower, the warm, well hot water runs down my skin and hair. Sending pleasurable shivers about my body. Closing my eyes I relax. Trying not to think too much, but really its inevitable. My thoughts always consume me when I'm alone with nothing to do. 

But before my thoughts could ruin me and break me down even more then they already have, I fell arms wrap around me. A gasp leaving my parted mouth. The only person that could even dare to do this, was Billie. And the thought of her seeing me, made me insecure. 

"billie.." I push out while trying to hide myself. 

"Baby, you are beautiful. So don't try and hide from me." Her voice held dominance. To which I could only do nothing but listen. I nod and press myself onto her. Letting the water wet her body to. Making every move more and more open to slippery. 

"Mama Maggie says we gotta hurry because we are running out of time, so I thought I could save some by coming in here with you." She whispers into my ear.

I smile, "What an excuse." I say as I turn so our fronts are pressing together.