I Will Never Let You Go.

Part Nine- Nathan.

Jayne pulls the car up outside the hospital and takes us towards it. We go in and I am took into a biggish, dimly lit room.

 “So Nathan,” The nurse says, “Your symptoms have included fever, breathlessness, drowsiness, weakness, and some weight loss?”

 “And my skin bruises really easily.” I show her the bruise from where Tom ‘punched’ me.

 “Okay.” She types it into the computer.

 “Right, I’m going to have to scan you Nathan.”

 “For what?”

“Abnormalities. It will only take a moment, so just lay on the bed there.” I lay on the smooth white bed and the machine’s bright light sends my eyes shut.

 "Nathan, we’re going to need a second opinion from a doctor, so wait a moment.” That’s the point I realise it is something serious.

 "Hello Mr Sykes.” A male doctor’s voice says. “You’re in the Wanted, aren’t you?”

 “I am.”

 “I thought so, my daughters love your band. Anyway, we’re going to do a blood test to check your bloodstream for any anomalies.” He gets a brand new needle from the packet. He picks a suitable point and the nurse squeezes it into my arm. I flinch at the pain, as I’ve always been scared.

 “Sorry about that. But we have a sample now, so it’s all oka-“ The nurse gets cut off.

 “Oh gosh, that’s not normal, is it?” The doctor focuses on the sample. “His blood is all contaminated. I’ll read it through the scanner.” He goes off to a different room to analyse my blood. It feels like the longest ten minutes of my life. He comes back, shaking his head, and whispers something into the nurse’s ear. It’s bad news. He leaves and the nurse sits closer to me.

 “Nathan, it breaks my heart to tell you this…” She tries to find the right words. She holds my hand. “But you have leukaemia.” My head falls into my hands. The words play around in my head. My whole world comes crashing down in an instant.

  I have cancer. I have a chance of dying prematurely. I’m going to lose all my hair to chemotherapy. I have everything to live for, and it could all be taken away from me.

 I start shaking then, terrified at the outcome of these events. I just don’t know where to start; don’t know what to say. I know I have to tell my bandmate’s, though.

  I stagger out of the room, close to tears by now. I feel as if I’m having a panic attack. They’re all waiting for me, alongside Jayne. “Nath, it’s alright, you can tell us.” Siva senses my anxiety.

 "Guys, I don’t know how to tell you this…”

 “Come on mate. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

  “But it’s not. Guys... I’ve been diagnosed with leukaemia." I look around at each of their expressions. Siva has tears pouring down his face, and brings me into a hug. Jay has a tear or two as well, and hugs me. Tom and Max just sit there in silence, as if the words haven’t sunken in. They look pretty devastated, though. Jayne is just distraught. She hugs me and I hear her whisper the words “My little boy.” I am like the son she never had; she’s like a mother figure to us all.

  But of everyone, telling Gracie would be the hardest. I’ve known her my whole life, so it breaks my heart to have to do this to her. But it has to be done.

 “Nath?” She comes walking towards me.

 “Gracie, I just want to say, I adore you. You make my life complete. You’re perfect, and I love you lots.” “But… why are you saying it like that?” I see the waterworks filling up in her eyes. “Oh gosh, it’s bad news isn’t it?”

 I nod solemnly. “Gracie, I’ve got cancer.” I say quietly. She wraps her arms around me, as do I. I kiss the top of her head, scared to let go. I don’t cry very often, but now is the time. My teardrops fall onto Gracie’s scalp, and I watch as they absorb. I’ve never had a hug like that before, and I might never have one again.