Love is a Losing Game

Chapter 4

Chapter four - loving you is a losing game

Weeks went by and the addict was still infirm. The two of them visited Duncan's main doctor and she said it was a normal part of detoxing. Taking her word for it, Laurence continued helping him through his illness until the sickness stopped. The soulmates celebrated and they were happy to put this behind them. 

It had only been a while after they had reunited but the ever-lasting love was true. Duncan knew this was the woman for him. He took a day off work and bought his true love an engagement ring. Rachel gave him the details of what she always said she wanted and the size he would need. 

Summers day, peaceful picnic, not a sad tear in sight. It was the perfect time to ask. Duncan asked her to stand as he knelt down on one knee.

"You have always been there for me and I know we have had some tough times but I know that you are my one and my only" He reached into his pocket and pulled it out. Laurence started to cry and ran away as soon as she saw it. His face filled with regret as he saw what he was holding. Duncan ran to find his sweetheart and eventually, she was sitting on a bench, her mascara smeared all over her face. 

"How could you go back! I told you that if you ever touched heroin again, we would be over!"

"Look, I was getting sick, and to be honest with you, I thought I was dying..."

"No! You- you do not get to be the one in the right here, ok? You were going to propose and you got me so excited with your sweet words but... it was a lie! A deception!" Cried Laurence, clearly in distress.

"You proposed to me with a bag of heroin, Duncan!" She added, mocking the addict for his mistake.

"I wa- I was hurting and I could see that was hurting you"

"Loving you is a losing game and it always has been. I don't even know why I want to play but, I've learned my lesson now. You lost me, forever." 

***

Back home, Duncan couldn't take it anymore. He didn't try to give it up, he took more and more heroin by the day. He knew it wasn't right but no one was there to stop him. He was so depressed about the break-up that he overdosed every day. If he kept going like this, he had weeks at best. 

Laurence wasn't doing well either, she was sleeping on her best friend's sofa. It wasn't good enough. She always had high standards but this was a low time in her life. She felt lost in her thoughts and all she could do was dwell; dwell in her sorrow and despondency. Rachel did everything she could to help but nothing worked. 

***

It was a miserable Monday morning when they spotted each other.  The lovers were both walking to work when they saw each other outside the same coffee shop that they first met. Nervous and anxious emotions overcame the two as memories flooded back. Stopping in their path, they gazed at each other while tears flooded down their faces. 

Laurence knew she was still deep in love and Duncan never doubted his feelings for her. Edging towards each other, they were about to kiss. 

"No, stop." Her mind was stuck on the moment when she was proposed to with drugs. 

"It's ok, I understand." 

"No, it's not that. I just-"

"You don't need to explain it to me, I get it. You don't want me anymore"

"Yes, I do! Listen, I have never stopped wanting you, Duncan!" Like a rocket, the emotions burst out of Laurence. 

"I've spent all of the love I saved for you on the first time I found the heroin. I love you unconditionally but you drained it out of me. I want you but it will take time for me to love you. It will take something big for me to feel that way again. Loving you was a losing game but wanting you, is a dangerous game" Storming off to work, Duncan was left with tears in his eyes and no idea about what had just happened. 

***

Later that day, he finally motivated himself to do something about his mental state. Making a long list, the first thing on it was 'stop drugs'. After feeling assured the list was complete, he made a start; going from top to bottom. 

"Hey Phil, this is Duncan"

"Yeah, what do you want? Is there a problem?" A rough-hewn voice answered. 

"Well, quality, no; demand, yes. I have to cancel next week..."

"When you wanna reschedule? Earlier or later?"

"Never... Listen, I can't do this anymore" Explained a whisper. 

"No, you can't quit. I can't afford for you to quit." The man burst. 

"I bet you aren't, not in your state. You're just switching dealers! Who? I can get you better quality" 

"It's not that, Phil!" The addict shouted, realizing he was being too loud.

"I just... Laurence. I need to stop." Ending the call, the words echoed in his empty mind. Dealers were dangerous; Duncan just hoped Phil wasn't planning to take action.

Stress and anxiety clung to his body, making him unable to move. An intense sentiment of frustration overpowered the addict. Inundated by his rage, the seethe capitulated to his exasperation and tumbled to the floor...

Word count: 919

(A/N)  Leave any suggestions for this chapter or future chapters/storylines in the comments. Thanks for reading and supporting me.  NF