if you're reading this

im sorry your mom died

i'm sorry your mom died
and that your father sold your house
he told me it was because her presence
lurked in the corners
and every step unlocked a new memory.

I found it morbid and sweet
in a lovingly twisted way
i've never heard my father speak of my mother
in a tone anywhere near the admiration your father's held
and my mom's still alive
they're just not on speaking terms
and haven't really been for years now.

i'm sorry i keep bringing up your dead mom
i've never been very good at death
i haven't experienced a lot of it
and truthfully i'm not very good at empathy either
simply because i used to be too good at it
and now i'm on this medication to fix that
except now i don't feel anything at all
and your moms dead.

sorry i said that again but you can't be too mad because it's the truth
and i'm sat here thinking of things to say besides the obvious
and i'm sorry that i can't bring her back
and that your father cries when a certain stair makes that creaking noise
and that strangers walk your house every day
sifting through the memories of your childhood
and tracing the same steps we took that night you broke my arm
as they decide whether or not your safe haven is good enough for their money
as if there is a price tag on memories no longer obtainable.

I've heard people don't like hearing i'm sorry when they're dealing with a loss
but i'm sorry that it's all i've got.