Find myself at the start again
He had started drinking again. Theo had noticed.
It was subtle, and it was never around Hermione. Theo knew he didn't want to worry her, but Draco wasn't so worried around the boys he had been friends with since he was 11.
"Mate, is everything alright with you recently?" Blaise asked once whilst they were all enjoying a night at the bar, he had noticed his friends absent-ness as they were laughing about another one of Theo's failed romance attempts. The poor guy couldn't catch a break.
Draco scratched more at the mark, more than before. It was almost like it was torturing him. He couldn't stop thinking about it, and the looks he got daily didn't help. Everybody knew the Malfoy's and their stories. He was pretty sure Lucius was now a scary story that witches and wizards told their kids to get them to behave.
"The scary boogy man Lucius will come and take you away if you don't eat your breakfast"
Wherever he went, it followed. And it followed Hermione too.
He had managed to keep it in check, until recently. It started again. The voices, the guilt, the paranoia. PTSD the healer called it, some muggle illness that he was diagnosed with a year ago. The war was catching up with him.
"Of course I'm fine," he replied finishing his drink, "I'm gonna head back guys, Granger will be waiting for me and I can't keep my lady waiting"
Blaise knew he was trying to play it off, whatever he was feeling, but he didn't want to pry.
"No worries mate, see you soon"
He hugged both the boys and walked out of the pub.
This was the last time both Theo and Blaise saw Draco alive.
Could they have done anything more?
Maybe.
********
I can't believe I'm letting go, it's only for the best you know
Nightmares woke Hermione up again. Vivid images. She sat up in a panic of sweat and tears, and the bile rose in her throat. Having no time to get to the toilet she vomited over the side of the bed.
Once her stomach was empty, she grabbed her wand off her bedside table and muttered the words "scourgify", cleaning up the mess she had made.
She ran her fingers through her hair, how long could she go on like this. A month now, since he left her. A month since she had got more than 30 minutes sleep at night. She was running on empty.
The ministry had given her a leave of absence, the sleep deprivation and the grief piled on top of her.
Harry checked in every day, like clockwork. Pansy often accompanied him when she had the time away from the shop, but they were both equally concerned.
Their best friend had dropped a lot of weight that she almost looked like a ghost, her clothes hung off her heavy, and she looked like she hadn't slept in years. This was destroying her and there was nothing they could do.
Harry had one last attempt, to get Hermione out of this stage of grief.
Pansy was less impressed with his idea.