In Denial | Alex Turner

XXXVI

"Make sure you plug that in the new amp!" Stellar, their manager, yelled from beneath the stage. I was standing next to him; where the crowd would be the same night.

"Oh, and Matt, get the new drumsticks Marianne brought!" he yelled again, making me roll my eyes and sigh in despair. I really didn't want to be there. Their manager was annoying and didn't seem to like me much.

"So, Monica was it?" he turned to face me with a hint of annoyance in his face.

"Yeah, Monica," I replied with a forced smile on my lips. He took the orange shades standing on his nose off and placed them on the collar of his yellow undershirt.

"What are you? Turner's shag or something?" he teased, looking away from me as he ran a hand through his silver hair.

"Their friend," I kept smiling forcefully, trying my best not to snap at him.

"Right," he snorted a laugh and pulled out his phone, dialing a number.

It had been three weeks since Alex and I had slept together for the first time and I honestly didn't know what we were. We never spoke about it. I was afraid we weren't on the same page, so I just avoided the topic as much as I could. We had more moments and spent more nights together in the span of those three weeks, but we never talked about it. We just let it happen.

We were all back in New York. Elle and I's days off were finished and we had to go back and work, whereas the guys had a break for two weeks.

I was at the venue they would have the last show before their two weeks, listening to them practise. Breana, Katie and Elle couldn't make it, so I had to be alone with that manager of theirs that didn't fail to make me feel like shit.

Muffled noises accompanied my thinking about the recent events as my mind brought me back to Alex and I's moments, making me grin at myself as I had zoned out, looking at my boots.

"Monica, will you do me a favour?" Stellar came back from his phone call and snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Uh, sure?" I questioned, fearing of that 'favour'.

"Give your address to that woman over there," he pointed at a blue-haired woman standing just a few steps away with a clipboard in her hands, talking to another woman.

"Why?" I snapped, furrowing my eyebrows. I earned a groan and an eyeroll from the man standing in front of me.

"Because, darling," he shook his head. "The guys have to attend an event today and since you're all around the media, you need to be there. The woman is the stylist and she'll come over to get you ready? Anything else?" he sighed in frustration.

Over those three weeks, I was 'seen with the Arctic Monkeys having fun in Paris and New York' a lot. There were some pictures of me on the internet and people had found my social media, making my requests go crazy. Most articles were about Alex and I, though, talking about how we were seen walking together in each other's embrace and such. It had made my dad call me a few times, saying how I should be careful and all.

"And why can't I just get ready by myself?" I squinted my eyes, giving him a look.

"Because judging by your trousers choice today, you clearly don't know how," he smiled and, with that, left without me having a chance to protest.

My trousers went perfectly fine with the rest of my outfit and I was sure about that, considering the same blue-haired woman had told me I looked 'stunning' when I walked through the venue door with everyone earlier that day.

"Uh, hey, excuse me," I patted her shoulder softly, making her turn around immediately.

"Oh, hey!" she grinned from ear to ear and dismissed the other woman with a 'thank you'.

"So, uhm, Stellar told me to give you my address for tonight," I awkwardly explained as I kept looking at her. 

"What for?" she furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"He said that 'judging by my trousers choice today', you need to style me for the event," I placed my hands behind my back and locked my fingers together.

"Oh, Monica, don't listen to him, your trousers are completely fine," she smiled and looked down at my outfit.

"Yeah, no, it didn't bother me, don't worry," I huffed a laugh and took my phone out. "Anyways, this is my address," I showed her my phone screen and she took her own out, typing it down.

"Alright, I'll actually need you to have Breana, Katie and that other friend of yours with you, so we can be done quicker, you know," she explained with a smile as she put her phone back in the pocket of her green jeans.

"Yeah, sure! I'll see you tonight then," I smiled and she pulled me in for a hug. I was taken aback but soon hugged her back before we quickly pulled away.

I walked back in front of the stage and watched as Jamie was accompanying Alex's strumming carefully, trying the sound out.

"Mon, come up an' play what I taught you back in Paris!" Jamie gestured me to get on the stage. 

I protested a bit but then Matt came from behind me and carried me back up at the stage without letting me protest anymore.

"Put me down, Matt!" I managed to yell between laughs. He eventually put me down next to Alex.

"'Ere," he handed me his guitar as he kept eye contact. 

"Are you sure? What if I break-"

"Just shut up an' take the guitar!" they all exclaimed in sync, making me laugh. I took the guitar off Alex's hands and let him adjust the strap around my shoulders.

Matt counted for us with his drumsticks and then started playing with Nick. I knew the song by heart by then so I knew where to start. I started playing the riff Jamie had shown me and smiled at myself.

"Outside the cafe by the cracker factory
You were practicing a magic trick
And my thoughts got rude, as you talked and chewed
On the last of your pick and mix..."

-

I was standing outside the venue, leaning on Alex's car and waiting for him as he'd told me to. I was starting to get worried as it'd been fifteen minutes and he still hadn't come out. I had started picking on my lips as I held my coat close to my body. 

Suddenly, I felt two cold arms sneak behind me and wrap around my waist. I jumped at first but then the familiar cologne calmed me down.

"Didn' mean to scare yer, love," he whispered in my ear before planting a kiss on my temple.

"It's okay," I whispered back in the same tone before he spun me around quickly and pushed me on the black car.

"Oh, we're getting brave now, aren't we?" I commented teasingly and huffed a laugh.

"D'you not like it?" he arched an eyebrows as our faces kept inching closer.

"Nah," I joked and watched him smile before making our lips crash together.

"Oi, leave that for later, I'm starvin'! Matt called out behind us and made us jump away from each other. 

Matt was the only one who knew about us since he'd caught us kissing a couple of times, but he'd promised not to tell anyone until we were ready.

"Look at how his face fell," Matt commented and pointed at Alex, snorting a laugh. I tried my best to keep myself from laughing as well, as his face had fallen into a disappointed frown.

"Reyt, I'm not buyin' yer lunch then," Alex took his car keys out and unlocked his car.

Matt and I called out a dramatic 'no', making him laugh.