Tantamount

Vigilant

Song: Home - Edith Whiskers // Wait - M83

I opened my eyes slowly as my breathing created a fog in front of my face. The room was cold and dark. I moved my arms reaching for my throbbing headache, sounds of chains rang like sad church bells warning me I was once again awake. The dirty bed I was in made my skin crawl but I couldn't get out of it. My father entered the room 

"Good morning sweetie. Ready for work?  Clients are eager today."

I stared at the ceiling not revealing how terrified I was of what was to come. My father has hated me since the day I was born and my mother was under my father's influence. I could never tell if she loved me or not, my father controlled every aspect of her life, he treated her like a punching bag he could denigrate. The life in her eyes had died long before her body did and I couldn't help but grieve the mother I never really met the woman whose fire, if she ever had any, was smothered to death. I missed what never was but could've been. A happy family.

The first man came into my cell, I didn't have to look at him to know he was a horrible person who was going to do horrible things to my body and I couldn't do anything but watch as what was left of my innocence was burned alive. My father had made a very particular business, brothels were for men, not necessarily good men but they were still somewhat men, somewhat human. My father's clientele wasn't for humans, it was made to feed monsters. Monsters who wanted to exercise their power over others, who got off by inflicting pain. Through years I was faced with the same situation. Men would get close to my bed and run their hands through my skin as if it belonged to them. They would use knives and all sorts of torture methods, they would rape and do inconceivable things to my body. Thankfully, unconsciousness would give me a hand from time to time leaving me only to deal with the aftermath. My father would come each night, unlocking the doors of my cage, and make some damage himself.

"You're a waste of space (y/n)" The only reason I keep you alive is that you make good money"

He landed a punch on my face, one of many to come. 

"You will die here."

He kicked my ribs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Eyes flung open and my breathing was shallow, sweat making my clothes stick to my skin . Sweat ran down my forehead and a tear made its way down my cheek. A gruesome reminder I haven't escaped my demons yet. I stood from my bed and headed to the kitchen, it was midnight-ish. Not that we could tell time in here. I grabbed some water trying to soothe my dry throat. I heard the floor creaking and quickly turned around in high alert only to be met with a small figure.

"(y/n)? i ... I couldn't sleep" It was sweet sweet Charlie.

 "Nightmares again?"

His small body walked closer and through the dim lights, I could see small droplets adorning his face. He must have been crying. "Yeah. Dreamt everyone was hurt and I was alone." He said as he tried to dry his eyes. 

I kneeled down and picked the little boy in my arms. "I see. I will do anything to keep you safe you know that right?" The boy looked at me with big eyes, there was still light in them, and even in this poorly lit room, his eyes made me feel as if the sun was outside welcoming us with warmth. 

"How about I sing you something?"

The boy smiled a bit, I would do anything to keep that innocent smile on his face but the world is a cruel place. I sat down on a nearby chair and carefully cradled the little boy in my arms.