Unknown Heroes ◆ JeonJungkook✔

Thirteen: The No-Sexy Club

"He was kidding, wasn't he?"

So far, my life hadn't been all that peachy. And, really, I thought I had arranged myself with it, but this was too much.

I stared down at the package in my hand, feeling lost in the middle of an abandoned aisle at our grocery store around the corner. To my luck was no one around - I mean, who would be at fucking one in the morning?

My anxious ass likes to avoid running into people when buying stuff by going shopping at ungodly hours like this - which came in handy tonight.

"He was kidding, wasn't he?" I repeated out loud into the empty room, ogling the condom package unimpressed. For some reason the box had a fancy holographic effect that reflected the bright artificial lights above my head, looking nothing like what I imagined condom packs to look like. God, I'm such a virgin.

"Damn, you're one lucky girl." The cashier felt the need to point out when I threw the box onto the counter (as if this wasn't embarrassing enough already).

"Ah, no, they're not for my dick." I waved it off, making the cashier drop the toothbrush she had just scanned coughing.

"I meant uh- if you buy condoms of that size..." She trailed off, clearly having understood her mistake.

"M-hmm." I still believed he'd just been fucking around.

"T-That must feel-" Why was she still rambling? She was only making it worse for the both of us.

"M-hm, yeah." I cut her off, putting the groceries in my Totoro-Bag.

"Ah, sorry. I shouldn't have mentioned it." The girl mumbled awkwardly after I interrupted her, "Usually customers will laugh it off."

Usually

"I see." I said curtly.

"Not that fond of that topic?" She smiled understanding.

I scoffed, "Not really."

Her smile deepened, "I get it." Yeah, no, she didn't. "That'd be 47 000 won." I fumbled a moment with money, all the while giving her time to keep on speaking, "You see, I'm ace too."

I halted for a moment, before a metaphorical light bulb blinked over my hand and I smiled sheepishly, handing her the money, "Oh, no, I'm not asexual. Just a little negatively biased, I guess."

She nodded puzzled, clearly embarrassed because she had misjudged me so quickly.

I was about to ask her why she felt like bringing all this up in the first place, but then I realized that, hey, I'm drawing very much sexual smut although I can't picture myself sleeping with anyone anytime soon.

People have their reasons.

When I came back, Jungkook was still sitting in front of the TV, watching some cheap drama sleepily - and of course very shirtless.

"Here." I grunted, throwing the condom package at him from the kitchen counter.

He huffed out startled when the item hit his chest, wide awake immediately, "Ah, thank you very much, Bambi!" He said with faked glee, even going as far as bowing a little in my direction.

"Fuck you." I grumbled, filling water into our water heater.

"What?" He looked at me in false shock, "You were the one proposing to buy me condoms!"

"If you don't shut up I will pour cement into that empty void that's your head." I glared at him, throwing a wet kitchen towel after him when he started laughing.

"You're so mean." He pouted after having dodged the towel, watching me climb onto the kitchen counter to grab the tea he was always putting on the very top shelf - to piss me of on purpose, like everything he's doing. "And short." He added when I reached up while somehow balancing on top of the counter.

"No, I'm not." I snarled, regretting climbing up here because now I had nothing to throw at him, "You're just tall."

He snickered, leaning back into the sofa with spread legs, looking very smug, "Good to know everything on me is proportional?"

"Oh, shut up. I know you were lying about the size." Where the fuck did he hide the god damn tea?

Now he was laughing for real, head thrown back against the cushions while he cackled like a fucking child, "Keep telling yourself, Bambi."

"Shut up, where's the tea?"

___

Jungkook enjoyed watching her struggle more than he'd like to admit. Of course he'd put the tea up there on purpose. Why wouldn't he, after she was making his live a living hell by waking him up at the crack of fucking dawn just because she was making tea?

She deserved to be punished for making her insomnia everyone else's problem. Or, well, his problem, since he was the only other person living here, but who cares about details.

"Shut up, where's the tea?"

Apparently he'd done an a little too good job at hiding it.

With an amused sigh, he stood up from his cozy seat on the couch, walking over to her struggling ass, who was at very high risk of falling off the counter and breaking her neck.

"Careful Bambi, wouldn't want you to fall." He mumbled, rubbing his eyes lazily.

"Then why did you put it there?!" She glared at him, making him grin.

She really was turning him into some kinda masochist by making him enjoy being death-glared at.

He stopped behind her, reaching up to tap his finger against the tea box she hadn't noticed before, "There, dumbass."

"Shut up, fuckface."

He retreated his hand without taking the tea for her, forcing her to reach up and take it herself.

"You-" She sighed, "I hate you."

"Serves you right for calling me names." He stuck out his tongue.

Jungkook stepped back to watch her take the tea, eyes traveling down to where her shirt rode up and exposed pale skin. Damn, she really needed to go out into the sun some time. Not that he hated the way her skin looked.

Wait what?

His eyes remained glued to the exposed spot of skin til she had climbed back down, feeling a clammy hand swat his naked chest, just to look up into furious eyes, "You're terrible and you're banned from touching my tea."

His lips twitched and he faintly realized that what she said was kind of funny, but his mind was too busy muddling over the fact that this tiny spot of skin had somehow managed to turn him on for some reason.

Oh no.

"Aye, you listening?" Now his head was getting swatted, bringing him back into reality.

"Huh?"

"I said not tea for you."

He bit back a grin, "We'll see about that."

___

shout out to all my asexuals. I love y'all bcuz you're cool

xx