bed bug hickies - wilbur soot x male!reader

eighteen

tw: homophobic thoughts, kinda graphic description of anxiety attack 

wilbur angst pog

/

Wilbur Soot

@WilburSoot

Will be streaming ylyl in roughly thirty minutes with a special guest !

-

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Wilbur muttered, poking his head up from under the desk to look at (y/n) who's sitting behind it waiting.

(y/n) shot him a reassuring smile. "Yes, besides, the fans will soak up the brotherinnit content."

Wilbur rolled his eyes but felt his nerves relax. The stream would be fine, everything would go to plan. He just couldn't kiss him, or admire the way he tilted his head back when he laughed, or-

This was going to be harder than he thought.

"Will," (y/n) muttered, kneeling in front of the taller male. "It will be okay, even if it hits the worst-case scenario we will all support you."

Wilbur smiled, cupping (y/n)'s cheek so he could kiss him. (y/n) kissed back, both of them melting at the tender gesture. They pulled apart a few seconds later, a light blush dusting both of their faces.

"You ready?" Wilbur asked, scooting his chair back to its original position. (y/n) gives him a grin and a nod, taking his place on the spare chair next to Wilbur.

Wilbur watched the viewers roll in as the 'starting soon' music and screen were shown to viewers. (y/n) hummed along to the music, leaning his head on Wilbur's shoulder.

Chat was moving faster than normal, prompting mods to switch it to slow mode so Wilbur would have a better chance at reading it.

"Tommy's in chat," Wilbur said, clicking to see who else had joined them. "Dream, George, Techno, and Phil are here also." He read off as (y/n) looked over his shoulder.

"You got the whole family." (y/n) jokes and Wilbur laughed, turning back to his boyfriend. He gave him a small kiss, taking his hand in his below the camera view as he turned on the facecam.

"Hey chat!" Wilbur said cheerily, (y/n) waving in greeting.

"So as you can guess this is my special guest," He motioned towards (y/n) who blushed under the attention, "And majority of you actually guessed it pretty close, this is Tommy's brother."

Chat erupted in questions and various comments of intrigue. Wilbur felt a twinge of smugness at the few comments he saw already simping for the boy. Oh if only they knew.

"Hi chat," (y/n) says excitedly. "Thank you all for the nice messages!"

Wilbur read off a few donos before he allowed people to send in videos for the challenge. He went over the premise quickly to (y/n) - he already explained it but still - and (y/n) nodded, squeezing Wilbur's hand under the table.

It was getting hard to keep himself from blushing, especially when he saw '(y/n) x wilbur new ship pog'. He ignored it and (y/n) didn't seem to notice, gushing over a cat video a user had sent in.

They eventually both lost at a dumb clip from Phil's stream earlier that week, both agreeing to keep streaming and just chatting for awhile longer.

He answered a few mundane questions - mainly how he and (y/n) came to living together - and he answered in some absurde story that chat soaked up. (y/n) only rolled his eyes in response, telling the chat that Wilbur was an idiot.

They read through chat a few more times before one comment made Wilbur's skin crawl.

'i think they're holding hands, awe!!' The comment made Wilbur clench the arms of his chair. (y/n) gave him a confused look before looking over at chat and seeing the comment, along with a few other users mentioning their body language.

Wilbur let go of his boyfriend's hand, subtlety moving his chair to create a few more inches of distance. (y/n) gave him a hurt look but quickly covered it up when someone donated another question.

Why did he do that? Why was he so fucking terrified of people finding out about his relationship? So what if a few people made homophobic comments, he knows that it's only going to be a small minority.

Still, everytime he thinks of displaying his relationship his stomach drops to his feet. He doesn't want people to scrutinize them, treat him differently because he isn't straight. A scary part of him doesn't ever want to come out, stay in the closet with (y/n), act like he's pretending and jokingly flirt with (y/n) like Dream and George do.

His stomach turns as he gets lost in thought. When he comes back to the present by (y/n) laughing at a chat dono. He eyed the chat but his brain was buzzing with thoughts that sounded much too close to his parents for comfort.

"We need to go." Wilbur said hasitely, reaching over to end stream. Chat was confused as (y/n) was at the abrupt ending.

He clicks the end stream button and OBS is still shutting down when (y/n) speaks up.

"Wilbur, what happened?" (y/n) asks, his voice strained. "W-we can't even hold hands and-"

"They can't know," Wilbur says harshly, cutting off (y/n). Wilbur sighs, keeping his back turned from (y/n) who had stood up. He takes a deep breath.

The air grows stagnant as neither of them say anything and Wilbur knows he should refute the claim. Say he wants his fans to know about them and make those edits he's seen float across his timeline from time to time of Dream and George but his words get stuck in his throat and he hears (y/n) sniffle.

He turns, finding (y/n) wiping his eyes. Guilt washed over him.

"I don't want them to look at me differently. I don't want- I can't, I'm not strong enough." He admits, looking down at his hands. They shake and he balls them into fists and his eyes burn with unfallen tears.

(y/n) doesn't reply. He sits back down in his previous chair and sighs, taking Wilbur's hands in his own.

"Will," The shorter boy whispers. "You're the strongest person I know, I know your parents are shitty people, and I know you count Tommy as your best friend, and I know you admire all of your friends, and I know how hard everything has been but christ, Will, I'm not- I'm never going to leave you, I promise."

Wilbur nods silently, his mental barriers breaking as he cries, letting (y/n) hold him tightly into his chest. The angle is slightly awkward but he feels safer than he's ever felt being held by (y/n) in that moment.

He tires to form some type of apology for snapping and ending the stream but (y/n) shushes him, kissing his forehead.

"You don't owe anyone an explanation, Will." (y/n) whispers and Wilbur smiles softly, burying his head into (y/n)'s soft shoulder. 

/

a.n: sorry its short i have no braincells D:

hope you enjoyed!

-remy