Darkness

Letters

Dear Gaius,

I'm sorry for not telling you my true intentions before I left. I avoided you because I knew if anyone could talk me out of it, it would be you. Things have been relatively quiet lately, and my magic has been restless. Arthur and Gwen are happy, Camelot is thriving, and I've been distracting myself, buying time. As you may have figured out by now, I'm going in search of Morgana. Alator sent word to me that she was seen near Mercia. I need to know what she's planning so that I can protect Arthur. Protect Camelot and my home. I can't rest knowing that she is so determined to bring an end to all that I love. I plan to stay with my mother for a few days before investigating. I should be home within a week or so. If I am gone longer than a fortnight, then something will have gone wrong and my mother will have arrived in Camelot with letters for Arthur and Gwaine. I left a letter with Arthur that tells him of my magic and all I have done for him. Please keep an eye on him and reassure him that destiny or no, he was my friend and I stayed willingly. He should know that anyway, the prat. If my mother comes, tell her of some of my adventures. I always make it back, you know I do. So, be patient. I have no intention of dying, but I cannot say when I may return. Tell Leon, Elyan, Percival and Gwaine to keep their eyes on our King until I can make it back. Try not to worry. I'll be back before you can say destiny.

~Merlin

Dear Gwaine,

By the time you get this, you may already know that my trip did not go as expected. I'm sorry for not telling you, but I knew if I had that you'd insist on accompanying me. This was something that I needed to do. I needed to know what Morgana might be up to. My magic has been restless, but spending time with you has been so wonderful. Don't worry about me. You know how I am. I always turn back up. Don't abandon Arthur to try and search me out. Go on patrols, and do your Knightly duty, but don't be too brash or unthinking. The cabbage-headed king of ours is going to need your help and support without me around to back-talk him. I hope I'm not gone long, but I wanted to write this so you'd have something of me to hold onto. I'm not going to say to remember me by, because I have every intention of returning. But, I don't know how long it will be. Stick with Percy and Elyan. Even Leon. I should tell you, Arthur knows of my magic now. I left him a letter before I set out detailing some of what I've done. You should all get a drink together and talk of my exploits. I hope to see you soon. All of you.

With my deepest affections,

~Merlin

Dear Clot-pole,

Don't be mad. I know that will be your first reaction. You'll be mad. Mad that I didn't tell you, mad that you didn't figure out that I was up to something, mad that you hadn't sent anyone after me. Then you'll be disappointed or upset that you let me talk you out of all of the above. I chose my path, Arthur. I chose to follow you, and I would do so until the day I die. I've promised you that before, and it remains true. I'm sorry for being dishonest with you one last time. I felt I must in order to protect you best. You know of my magic now and what I have done for you and this kingdom. I wish I could have told you. I wish we could have had time to sit down and talk for hours like we've done countless times before, only this time I could be fully myself. I used to have nightmares of being sent to the pyre, or sitting and waiting for an axeman to take my head off at a command, or even be hanged. The nightmares have faded to a bad memory seeing how you treat your people and how you respect everyone, noble and peasant alike. We may have got off on the wrong foot, but I'm glad to have met you and been able to be by your side and help you to become the King you are today. I'm not just saying all this because I don't think I'll see you again. I fully intend to come back and pick up where we left off. But, I'm unsure how long I'll be gone. If my mother has had to deliver you this letter, then I don't know what has happened, or how long it will take me to return or escape. So, don't go hold a funeral for me. I'm not dead. Just to get one last secret out, go easy on the Knights, especially Gwaine. He cared for me, so this won't be easy. Try not to let him push you all away. He's going to be angry and hurt that I've left him. Not that I'm encouraging it, but don't be afraid to throw him in a cell if he tries to abandon his knighthood to find me. I will be back. I swear. Take care of Gwen, she'll be furious that I've left as well. Don't give up on me.

~Merlin