One Shots [Niam]

Trapped

SHIP: None

WARNING THIS STORY CONTAINS: Suicidal Thoughts, Depression, Self Harm.

Niall's Pov:

It was dark. Not a single sound echoed throughout my room. In the silence of the room, I feel as though I could shout as loud as I could for years without anyone hearing me. My eyes were fixated on the ceiling above me. The room felt still and heavy against my body, like it held me in a never ending trance I couldn't escape.

Dark thoughts filled my mind throughout the night. Memories of self harm crossed my mind. The feeling of the sharp blade against the skin on my wrist created a twisted smile on my face. The smooth and ease flow of blood out of my body soothed my pains. The mind numbing pinch from the blade created a sense of happiness within me, which seems to be the only feeling that is close to happy I get anymore. But when rays of light reflect across my blade, catching my eye, I feel uneasy.

Standing in an empty, dark room with a rope around my neck also gave me a rush of happiness. Knowing I could become less sad with a simple step off a chair gave my senses a wave of happiness which calmed me. Some nights I would tie the rope tightly around my neck just to feel that calming sense of happiness. But when reflections of the white light beyond the chair cross my mind, the once calm feeling of happiness I had, become tense.

Standing above a busy highway in the depths of the night gave me a smile. Standing on the bridge's edge, I wanted a larger feeling of freedom. As my mind grew more towards freedom, my steps loosened closer to the edge. Amongst the darkness of the night, flashes of lights from the cars made me nervous.

But even as no sound echoed throughout the room, my mind was loud with thoughts. The darkest of rooms hold the minds of many individuals, captivating them with rays, reflections and flashes of hope. But in the darkest of rooms, I feel happy.