Clinging On (KARLNAP)

Ch 13 "Medusa And A Siren Combined"

Tw: Suicide, self harm, sexuality insecurity, anxiety

Sapnap POV

   "Holding hands, now are you?" Dream smirked as he put the key into the ignition. His smug face made me want to punch him.

   "I know! I don't know what's wrong with me!" I whined and I hit my arm on the car door, it was the arm that is burned. And I shoot up, "Ouch! Shit!!" I rolled up my sleeve and I see a crack in the rough patch of my skin where it started to bleed. "Shit!" I repeated, I opened up the storage underneath the air bag, I know Dream keep's his tissues, wipes, pads, tampons and condoms in there, so I swear if I don't find a damn tissue I'm going to be pissed. Luckily, I found a tiny travel pack of tissues and quickly press them against my arm.

   "Come on, Sap, really? You ain't gotta take your anger out on yourself." Dream responded as he held the brake pedal in the parking lot and changed his gears back to park.

   "I didn't mean to, dipshit!" I sighed before dabbing the blotted tissue trying to get all the blood. It wasn't much but it hurt like shit having that skin tear a bit. I'll be fine.

   "I know that, Sap, now calm down, it's ok, you're fine. I'm sorry you hurt your arm." Dream's treating me like a little brother again. I don't mind it most times, but this time I'm just stressed out too much and I jump at his words.

   "It'll be alright, don't worry about it." I pulled my sleeve over it and I put the tissue into my pocket to throw it away when I get the chance.

   "Alright, now please tell me what date I intruded on." Dream continued, as much as I don't want to talk about my confusion I know this can't hurt me to talk it through with Dream who can somewhat relate because of George.

   This was gonna be a long drive.

   "I don't know! I don't know what came over me. I saw his hand and I wanted something to keep my hands busy so I grabbed on to it. Wait, no, I don't know- well-  to be honest I'm making that up, I don't know how my hand got there or what was going through my head because I didn't even notice it till Ponk pointed it out." I sigh, I held Karl's hands. His hands were smaller than mine. And his hands were much softer and warmer than mine, and the orange on top of his hands was intriguing knowing the orange is from me.

    "I watched you grab his hands, and you were so nonchalant about it. You just let your hand find his. It was cute."

   "Well, I didn't mean to do that. Why did I do that?!" I lay my head back. Seriously though what happened?

   "Hey, stop freaking out about it. Now what was with the flirting? While you were doing bench presses. Off topic but how much did you bench today?" Dream's adhd was a common factor of conversations getting carried away, for once I need a conversation to be on the same track, I need to talk about this shit and figure it out or it'll get to be too much for me.

   "200 today. I need to make my way back up to 225. Anyways, what flirting at the bench press?" I asked, getting us back on topic.

    "You said something like, how am I looking, and you got Karl all flustered, and his face went red. And then the whole race or whatever you wanna call that dance. The tension was just in the air, Sap." Dream has a good memory yet again with adhd he forgets things like, remember you're picking me up today. But it was always fine with him. I'm glad he can remember this though because I need to talk about this, I need to sort out my feelings with Karl.

    "I was just messing around, I don't know. Did Karl seriously get that flustered. Wait I don't remember his face going red. Wait, do you think Karl likes me?" The thought of Karl liking me scared me, he is a great friend, and I'm glad to call him my soulmate, though we're not together. He's a great and cute guy. But he doesn't need to like me, there isn't much to me to like, so how could he like me? We're just friends... Does he see us as just friends? Does he want me as a friend or something more?