Putz12 Plus One

THREE | A FLICKER IN A TRENCH

"Stupid, stupid sticky pieces of SQUIT!" Not even a mile's journey and he already had burdock stickers clinging to his pants like his teammates clung to him for victories. If there was anything he hated more than useless, defensive teammates it was these stupid plants. "Of course! No matter where I go something like this always happens to me! I couldn't just have a normal day, no! I had to have my weapon stolen from, trapped in the city of ugly, and now I have burrs all over my pants!"

"Psst..." Whispered a familiar voice. He turned around, face now red, staring at her mocking gaze.

"YOU!!!!" He gnashed his teeth, running forward only to be caught in the plants. "I'll, I'll, when I-"

Damn it, he couldn't get out. Even nature attacked him. "I'll have you arrested, your stupid face will be plastered all over the news! I'll make it so you never speak to your own family again!"

But she stayed smiling, charming, even. Her eyes did nothing but absorb his light, as fiery as it was. Like touching a flame in curiosity, the burn didn't outweigh the fascination. "Aw, that's okay. My family's dead."

He did nothing but sigh and roll his eyes. No one's ever acted that way in front of her before. "I don't know if that's an attempt to get me to sympathize, but the last thing you can expect from me..." He pulled the weeds off of his legs, which caused his arms to be tangled even more. And yet, she was there, unharmed, just watching. "is. Is. Geh- is, sympathy for a good-for-nothin' thief! You're a criminal, y'know that?!"

"A huh..." Iza unzipped the backpack.

"What are you doing?! You gonna shoot me?! Is that it, was this a plan to assassinate me? Are you working with DUDE?!"

The sound of a lid opening screeched through the air. He closed his eyes, expecting something terrible to happen. Then, he was met with the sounds of chewing. "Huh, who's that? Sorry, I'm eating."

"Is that... pudding?! No fair!" He was even more livid now. "Share some!!"

The alarm began to protrude their eardrums even more so. He thought the overtime sound was annoying during a Clam Blitz match, but this was just next-level torture. "GAH! Will you squidiots turn down that Cod-awful bullsquit?! My ears are gonna bleed for Christ's sake!"

"Yeah," she said between bites of pudding. "I'll just go and talk to the leaders of The Order and politely ask them to shut it off. That should work."

"Thank you."

She wasn't sure if he was ignorant or serious, but everyone surely knew of The Order. They spent all those years funding news broadcasts, telling them how the surface-dwellers hated them, how they didn't belong there, how they agree wholeheartedly with everything The Order did.

"Of course it won't work. What, are you stupid?!" She tossed the empty pudding cup right at his head. "That alarm was caused by you."

"By me?!" Offended and squeaky, his tone was one she'd rather not tolerate. It's not like she had much of an option anymore. "What did I do?! I don't even know where here is!"

"What do you mean?! You hate us, don't you understand?! That's why you blocked off access."

"What the shell are you talking about?!"

"You, I met with you up there in the surface."

"Normal world. We just call that the normal fucking world, you dumb ass!"

"Fine." She sighed. "Well if I saw you there, it means you were the one making sure we don't go up there. Any of us coming there would be killed, correct?" He didn't say anything but gave her a look of confusion. "Well, you know if anything risks something that goes against The Order alarms go off and chaos rings. So why did you come down here? For a weapon? That's not your job. Your job was to protect the gateway."