How You Love To Hate me

CHAPTER 42

"Try what?" But my answer seems to be met when I look up and see people dancing, whether it be a silly dance or a serious slow dance. 

Boram and Yoojung are both dancing too, each of them taking turns to spin the other around, whilst the rest cheer them on.

And swiftly I'm being pulled up by Jungkook, who places both hands on my waist gently. "Have you ever danced before? I mean, I can't exactly take you prom, so this is the best we'll get." He says, and noticing my silence and dull expression, he continues, attempting to make me feel better or whatever the fuck he's supposed to be doing. 

"Y-You're supposed to put your arms around my neck-"

"What are you doing?" I ask, voice barely level.

He's trying to make up with me but it's not working. Not like this.There's no response. "Since we can't go prom-"

"I'm asking," I breathe with an irritated sigh, "What do you think you're doing? Did I say yes?" 

He blinks a few times as I remove my hands away from him, "I don't want to dance with you Jungkook, and I never did." I say, noticing the attention of Jin and the others turning to us, though everyone else seems happy enough dancing and I'm happy for that.

Jungkook looks awkward and flustered as he tries to answer, "I just thought maybe-""Dancing with me or making a stupid fucking flower crown isn't going to do anything, you can't fix things like that." I notice how his lips slightly turn downwards and he looks away from me, eyes looking downwards nervously.

I take a step back releasing myself from his grip, and it takes all my willpower to not cry there and then. Seeing him look so deflated about something makes me hate myself, and maybe I was being too harsh but the feeling of hurt couldn't stop it.

"It was just a misunderstanding Lisa" He's so innocent-looking, biting down and nibbling nervously on his lips, and in contrast, I feel like a monster.

"You ever think it's us?"

"What?"

"I mean we've had a lot of 'misunderstandings'. Nothing ever happens between me and Jisung or Jin, maybe it's stupid even trying to be friends?" I ask, despite feeling something small shatter inside of me. Not something small, rather something big.

I notice how he tries to show he isn't upset, but his wide blinking eyes give it all away. I know I've gone too far, and this makes me even more upset. His eyes waver, as he takes in a shaky breath. He doesn't look at me, not once.

"Lisa stop, you're making him upset." Jin interrupts looking at me with disappointment.

He isn't even crying, but seeing him upset hurts me so, that my eyes start to water.

"No- he doesn't care about my feelings, he doesn't care if I cry or if I'm upset, why should I?" I object, shaking my head as if I'm a five-year-old when tears flow out.

"Look now you're getting upset." Jin says, "You both are absolute shit at communicating. Lisa didn't mean that Jungkook, she's just angry and Lisa, Jungkook didn't mean whatever he said-"