Modern Empathy ~ a Patrick Stump Fanfiction

Breaking Through

Saturday morning was a day filled with intended fun. We were going to lunch later, have some fun downtown, and then to dinner before Amber's first session with her work. Emily was planning to have therapy sessions with her clients over video conferences the next week.

"Are you sure about that?" I asked. "We would like you to take a week off, not overwork yourself."

"Zo, I want my clients to get help." she said.

"I understand that. But you need a break for you."

"Guess you're right."

I could relate with Emily. She was an empath, as was I, which we inherited from our long-gone mom. Specifically, I could relate with her, kind of, in that moment. She wanted her clients to feel better, and I wanted to know if Patrick Stump was feeling any better. I hadn't had time to sneak and see him. I hadn't talked with my family about it since I talked to Amber. He had been pretty much housebound unless he was doing something. In that case, I would be doing something out of my house as well.

That was when I thought, Are we spiritually related, or is this just dumb luck? We could be related in some way, like cousins from fifty generations back. He has naturally copper-colored hair with bluish-green eyes, which is what I have, too.

As I wrote in my journal on the subway, I thought to myself, Stop worrying about it, my ass! No matter what, I am right to be an empath, and I am kind to think of anyone I care about no matter what. Inherited it from Mom? Makes sense. So if I'm going think of Patrick every day and how he's doing, I'm going to do it!

While I tried to get my mind off of it after minutes of thinking, I talked with a friend of Amber's who was sitting with us at lunch about life.

I could drink my water and coffee okay, but I couldn't have half of my sandwich or chips, so we just had it to go in the end.

"Zoey, are you all right?" asked Kyle as we got into his car.

"Not exactly." I said.

"What's up, then?"

"Something that has been going on. . . since the end of February."

"What is it?" asked Amber.

"Remember what Taylor and I told you and Emily before Christmas? You know, about our walk all over our street? This has been my worst worry that has been killing me since I read a blog on Patrick Stump's website."

Amber's jaw dropped. Emily's eyes widened. Taylor was a bit puzzled, but eventually got it.

"I know what you're talking about." Kyle broke the silence.

"Wait, you're a Patrick fan, too?" I asked.

"Yeah. I met him last year."

"Cool. . ." I managed to put on a smile for a second.

Kyle assured everyone it was nothing to worry about, and then talked to me in the back as Amber started the car.

"He wasn't updating us fans for a while until he posted about those fake fans, and it was weird." he continued talking to me.

"Yeah." I said. "It was heartbreaking, too. I met Patrick as well, but not on tour, unlike you."

"How did you?"

"Taylor and I were on a walk, and he lives quite close to us. I found him on his porch. . ." Memories came back to me. ". . . and as I approached him, some sobs I heard got louder. . ."

"Yikes."

"Yeah. . . emotions are so beautiful. . . they can bring tears to your eyes."

Kyle chuckled. "True. Contagious as well."

"I'm at least happy I got to comfort him. . ."

"Ah, Patrick's hugs are the best."

"It felt great. I love how I could make him feel better."

"I bet you did, Zoey."

"I met Pete Wentz at Emily's work just before my birthday. He told me he promised that Patrick was okay. . . or at least. . . I hope he is, still." There was no point in me having it together anymore.

"I get it. You're trying not to worry and hope for the best, but you feel like hoping isn't doing it anymore."

"Exactly! I feel scared, despite the fact that it seems all hopeful. I'm scared that he might snap when I least expect it. I fear that he might go bankrupt when I'm a senior from this depression, and that there would be nothing we can do to deescalate this. . ."

At that point, I was sobbing harder than I expected myself to. Kyle pulled me right into a hug. I cried for what seemed like ten minutes, but really, it was just thirty seconds.

When I finally cooled off, Kyle said, "Hey, he's guest starring on the show House. House is filmed here."

"How do you know?" I asked.

"My brother loves that show so much."

"I know about the House thing." I smiled.

"Why don't we do something to clear your head out?"

I nodded.

"If you're overwhelmed, let me or Emily or Amber know." said Kyle.

"Sure." I said.