30 Rainy Days

Twenty-Second

Twenty-Second

I think that small argument really helps to knock some senses on Joong. I think it pushed him to finally be back at his original self. The one who's confident enough to win the battle. The one who's strong enough to fight for everyone, to fight for me, and for his self.

"Your temperature is going down. See? You only need to eat and drink your medicines" I stated after touching his neck.

It has been two days since that confrontation, Sunday, and Joong's fever is really getting better. Just his fever, the other side-effects of his therapies are still there, not having any plans to leave him alone.

Oh Joong, you should convince those side-effects to leave you alone instead of telling that to me. You're really dumb sometimes, you know?

"Kho thot na" he murmured like an obedient kid and I laughed happily at him.

"Like that!! Just be obedient and patient" I added again and he nods right away.

"I'm already a patient, as you can see.." he joked before a silly smile appeared in his lips. I just rolled my eyes at him. He can joke now, that's great!

"So.. do you want to sleep? Your eyes looks tired already" I ask him instead. Well, it's still afternoon, he just finished eating lunch and drinking his medicines so here he is, looking sleepy.

Overall he's still weak. He just stopped acting like a kid that made it easier for us to attend his needs unlike when he's acting like one but like what I said, the side-effects are still present.

"I want to ask you something first" he stated that knocked on my curiosity. I sat properly, my elbow at the bed so I can use my hands to cup and support my face as I listen to him.

"Shoot" I signalled for him to start asking whatever it is that he wants to ask.

"Did you really mean the things you said that night... when I asked you to leave?" He asked that made me furrow my brows.

"Particularly what?" I got confused in his question. I mean, what among my words? I think I said lots of it that night as I am the only one who keeps on talking between us. Now I'm confused on what part is he talking about.

He heaved a sad sigh.

"That I should've just stayed away from you from the beginning. Do you regret the things between us? Do you regret knowing me more and deeper?" He suddenly asked in a sad manner that influenced me to be sad too. His eyes, his expressions. Everything I can see in him as I stare is sadness.

That's why I immediately shake my head to deny all of his thoughts. Haist Nine, you really left a big and bad impact using your words!

"I didn't. I will never regret meeting you. I will never regret knowing you more. I'm sorry okay?.. that night, my mind is so messed up, I failed to handle my emotions so well that I mixed it all together.." I explained softly and he remained listening to me.

".. all I want that night is to convince you to fight for me, to continue breathing because I'm still waiting for your recovery. But I really did chose bad combinations of words to express what I want you to realize. I didn't mean to leave that kind of impressions to you through saying those words" I explained furthermore.

I really feel bad for saying those words. Look at Joong's sad expressions, he looks really hurt because of that.

"But you also have a point though. I was the one to initiate the deal between us. I was the one who started linking you to myself even though I have full awareness of my condition..." he gave me a faint smile before continuing his words ".. I am the one who entered your peaceful world but I'm also the one who asked you to leave. If I didn't push myself to you, you won't end up liking me.. you also won't end up stucked in this stressful and exhausting situation with me" he added.