The Make-Up Artist: Part 2

Chapter Thirty Eight: It's His Party and I'll Cry If I Want To

"Wait...what?" You say after a good five second pause. You had to take a moment to make sure you really heard him right as that was the last thing you expected to come out of his mouth. Taron has rarely agreed with you on matters of your relationship, and now he decides that you were right? Just as you decide you were wrong? You pull your hands from his grasp and stand to pace the few steps to the balcony edge. Looking out at the lights, you take a deep breath then turn back around to face him. He is still seated, clasping his hands together in front of him as he leans forward and gazes up at you with a concerned expression. "You don't want to be with me anymore?" You practically whisper.

"I didn't say that", he responds immediately, a slight edge to his voice. Your mind starts racing. Sure you were slightly concerned that Taron would no longer want to be with you once he returned, but not seriously, not really. A mistake on your part obviously. "I just said that I thought you were right, that we should wait until the Rocketman promo is over", he continues as your mind is still doing backbends. You hear the words he's saying, but you're not really HEARING him. All you hear is that he doesn't want you anymore.

"But all those things you said in your emails...", you trail off, remembering all the declarations of love that you gushed over. Had you misinterpreted his meaning? At this he stands and strides over to you.

"I meant every word", he says, taking your elbow in his palm to pull you slightly toward him. You pull from his grasp however, not wanting to be consoled at the moment. You walk past him to sit on the edge of your bed just inside the balcony doorway, and he steps to the frame, leaning against it and crossing his arms over his chest. "Isn't this what you wanted?" He asks, confusion filling his voice. You must really be confusing the shit out of him.

"Well yes...I mean no...I mean I never WANTED to be apart from you. I just thought it was best at the time...", you trail off, feeling like a fool. He did say he wasn't going to chase after you anymore, what did you expect?

"And you were right", he confirms, coming to join you on the bed. He sits next to you, but doesn't touch you and you ache for him. You gaze at his hands in his lap as he continues. "If the past few months have shown me anything, it's that I've barely been able to make time for myself, let alone another person. I've been so busy that I wouldn't have had time to give you a proper relationship. And things will only get more crazy as we get closer to awards season. I would never want to feel like I was neglecting you. You still feel that way, right?" He asks as he tilts your chin up to look him in the eyes. Endless green pools with flecks of gold stare imploringly at you and at it tugs mercilessly at your heart. How can you go back on what you said now when everything he's saying makes perfect sense? You swallow down the large lump that has lodged itself in your throat before answering.

"Yes", you croak and flinch against the uncertainty you hear in your voice. Taron seems unconvinced as he tilts his head and creases form between his eyes.  You have to look away or you know you will crack. He says your name firmly which gets your attention and you snap your head back to him.

"You still feel that way...RIGHT?" he repeats, punctuating the last word. You stare at him for a moment longer, gathering your courage to still the voice in your head that wants to scream NO!

"Yes", you finally say a little more resolutely this time. "Of course. It makes perfect sense", you add with a little smile at your most convincing performance yet. He seems to visibly relax as his shoulders drop and his eyebrows resume their normal position. Although you see something indeterminable pass over his features for just a moment before he plasters a smile on his beautiful face. It almost looks like disappointment, but you can't be sure.