My life At Degrassi

Chapter 10: Part C : At Death's Door

* Warning this chapter may be hard for some people to handle*

It was Monday morning I arrived at school. People were giving me strange looks. I'm pretty sure my cousin told her friends which told the whole school. So it looks like I'm a fag to everyone.

Tristan came running over to me. He gave me a big hug and said it's going to be okay. In my head I know it's not going to be. At that moment I realized what I had to do.

When I got home I got some paper out of my science binder. I began writing a letter addressed to my parents.

Dear mom and dad,
If you haven't already heard. Your son is gay. I am so proud of the that I am. You can't change who I love. Praying the gay away is not going to help either. You probably hate me right now. But you don't have to worry. By the time you are reading this I should be gone forever. Hope you have a good rest of your lives.
Love , Giovanni

I knew if I told my parents they would throw me on the street right then and there. The next letter I'm writing is for Tristan this one I'm going to slip under his front door tonight.

Dear Tristan,
By the time you are reading this I'm probably dead. I can't go on anymore with people hating me just because I'm gay. It's just not right. And so Tristan I have had the biggest crush on you since I first laid eyes on you. I love your crazy personality. I love your humor. It just brings me to great joy. I love everything thing about you. I totally understand that you don't feel the same but I felt like I should tell you. I love you with all my heart and I always will. I hope you have a amazing life. And that you meet a amazing guy to be your husband. I see so much potential in you. You can be something amazing if you put your mind to it. Well this is probably the hardest letter I ever wrote. Just remember I'm really going to miss you. I love you so so much.
Love, Giovanni

After I wrote the letter to Tristan I started crying. I feel so alone. And I know Tristan has someone. But in a couple hours I will be gone and Tristan can have peace. And I can have peace.

Later that night I walked over to Tristan ' s house and I slid the letter under the door. Then I quickly ran home.

It was about ten at night. I walked in said goodnight to my parents and went upstairs. I got my parents letter and placed it in computer room where the go every morning. I then prepared myself to die.

I got undressed. I went into the bathroom. I got a razor blade and I began to cut away. The blood came oozing out of my left thigh. I then cut my right arm. The blood came rushing out of there to. I was quite happy with myself. The tub quickly began to fill up with blood. I heard banging on the front door. It was Tristan. I felt really dizzy. I began to cut even more.

Finally I collapsed into to my own bath of blood. I was waiting for this moment for a long time. Maybe today would be the day I'm gone forever. I would be so happy.