Cornelia Street // H.S.

one - welcome to new york.

Walkin' through a crowd, the village is aglow
Kaleidoscope of loud heartbeats under coats
Everybody here wanted somethin' more
Searchin' for a sound we hadn't heard before
And it said
Welcome to New York
It's been waitin' for you

***

I’ve been waiting for this day for 15 years, but now that it’s finally here I feel like I’m going to throw up. I’ve packed and unpacked my suitcase four different times to make sure I had everything I would need, I checked my plane ticket thousands of times to make sure it’s really for today, I’ve gotten in and out of my car probably ten times already, too scared to actually leave and head to the airport, but then I get scared I’m going to miss my flight so I put my car in reverse just to get nervous and put it in park again.

I really don’t know why I’m so nervous, this has been my dream for as long as I could remember. I’m obsessed with all of those cliche movies where a girl moves to New York for school just to find the love of her life and get that happy ending that every little girl wants for themselves. What I want for myself.

I’ll spend my time in coffee shops studying until late at night when one day, he’ll walk in. I’ll look up at the noise of the bell on the door going off and we’ll make eye contact and know, immediately. We’ll feel that pull towards each other and he’ll order his coffee before coming over and asking if he could sit down. I’d say yes and we’ll sit there for hours talking, laughing, getting to know each other, and then he’ll ask me for my number.

Or maybe I’ll ask for his. Screw the patriarchy.

Either way, we’d almost instantly fall in love but be too scared to tell each other until months later. It’ll be the kind of love where you don’t have to worry about anything going wrong because you know that it’s going to last forever.

I remember being little and watching all of these movies with my mom and when I was old enough, I’d sit on the kitchen countertop while she cooked dinner and would tell her all about it. She never called me delusional or told me that what I was saying was unrealistic. It was always, “That sounds beautiful Farren.” or “I can’t wait to see you go through with this when you’re older.”

My parents were the greatest and are the ones to thank for me even having the opportunity to go through with this. They always supported me but never have they ever just handed stuff to me. I worked for what I had. I got a job at 13 and didn’t spend a penny of it until my 17th birthday when I bought a car, my blush pink ford bronco. It was expensive as hell but as soon as I saw it, I knew I needed it. Plus, I had the money and it really didn’t hurt too much.