a rose, a nymph,her thoughts

if a guy loved me

Past events, I have mentioned playfully yet hoping the man I will love if a guy truly loves me he will buy me shoes. That is the one measurement I will hold on till the day I die, this is because I have a habit of buying footwear, even when unnecesary. I forgot what yours was,or maybe you didn't have any measurements since the first sign of bare minimum from a woman, you fall to your knees.   

2 days

2 days before my birthday, you device a suprise plan for me. You had it all figured out, you thought you had me figured out haha. You got a call from our friends, they saw me on the tracks ready to go enjoy my own time before turning 21.  

You suprised me from behind, I yell out of excitement. You stayed by my side till the clocks nearly striking twelve, your place 2 hours away from mine. 

"I took a sneak at your shoe size, I wanted to bring new shoes as your present today. I couldnt find them" you said

I told you, being here was enough . Which was true. We went back home. Then it dawn on me, did you had the intentions  because you love me? Did you remember those words? Or am i just crazy to assume. Well, maybe you don't love me, because you didnt actually got me those shoes, you tried though. Maybe that was what it is, you loved me but it's just wasn't enough, or it wasnt love, love that I wanted at least.

I saw my friend's post today, she got together with the boy that it was evident she couldnt get over at one point , they were inlove but I guess he didnt realise,  he had a girlfriend at that time so to leave so early he might mistaken it as just for lust.  Because of that, she seeked someone new to fall for that would eventually broke her heart. Anyway the point is, they got together, after 3 years. After they kept missing one another, but she couldn't be any happier. It's evident in her face.

Are we to end up like that? I kept missing you, now I no longer yearn for you but you slowly yearning for me, then you miss me. What's going to happen to us? I don't want to waste my time wondering, I'm tired I've been waiting for almost 4 years.

R.H

no longer yours, but your best friend