The Release

Chapter 17

She looked around her, the same room as before. Her body was shaking as she stared at the blank wall. Her body trembled as she heard the cries get louder and louder. Her body felt paralyzed as the handless door swung open. A young woman with no face stood there, holding a screaming baby in her arms.

"Please help me," the woman begged, holding out the baby to Meredith. She tried reaching out but it was like her arms weighed a ton.

"You have to do something!" The woman screamed again. Her voice was so familiar, but she couldn't comprehend the face. She tried to speak, but no words came out. She felt an overwhelming rush of wind coming from the open window that appeared, knocking the infant from the woman's arms and to the ground. Meredith couldn't fight the paralyzed feeling as she watched the baby fall to the floor, tears rushing down her face. It was like a force took over her, blinking a few times before she heard a loud beeping.

Her eyes flew open, her body covered in a cold sweat. She immediately grabbed the pager laying next to her head on the on-call bed. She couldn't shake the feeling of the dream. It was like she was really living it, her memory couldn't recall what the woman or the baby looked like. She turned her head, looking at the sleeping man beside her. This was the first time she had gotten to sleep in the same bed with him in almost a month. He spent almost every night with Grace in her room since she had her surgery. She had chosen to not bring up their problems, letting them go until Grace was better.

"Whose paging you at this hour?" He let out a groan, moving from the position he had been sleeping in since they laid down hours ago.

"Lexie," Meredith sighed, turning to look at him. He looked so distraught, his eyes had bags for days laying underneath them. She felt awful for waking him up.

"I miss laying with you at night," he murmured into her ear.

"I miss you too but Grace needs you a lot more than I need you," she said to him, placing a soft kiss against his lips.

"I should go check on her," he said, sitting up in the tiny bed they had to share.

"You should. I want to tell you something," she said with a small gulp. She hated opening up to people, but she had to learn to let him in.

"What's up?" He said, stopping immediately and looking at her.

"Im glad that page woke me up. I was having another one of those nightmares," she said, feeling like a scared child as she talked to him. She knew they were only going to get worse, and he knew of a few times she had them with him sleeping beside her but lately they have gotten worse. It was almost every night, she knew it was just a bad dream but they weren't going away with everything she had tried.

"Again?" He asked.

"I haven't wanted to bother you but they have been getting more and more vivid and scarier. I just don't know, I thought maybe if I talked about them they will go away," she admitted. She hoped they would eventually just stop, but it was like the longer she had them, the worse they go.

"I'm glad you're talking to me but Mer, I don't know how to help with that," he said with a frown.

"I just need you to listen, what do you think I should do? I don't even want to close my eyes. It's like I'm always there," she said, feeling her chest tighten as she spoke about the nightmare.

"Have you thought about therapy? Maybe it can help you find ways to help?" He offered.

"I don't need a shrink, I mean there isn't anything wrong with me," she immediately shut him down. She didn't want to talk to some stranger about her problems, she wanted to finally let him in and he didn't have the answers she was looking for.