Text Me If You Can (YiZhan FF)

What do you want?

Yibo's thumb hovered over the call button, trying to talk himself out of calling Xiao Zhan. Was it worth going down this rabbit hole, just to quell his curiosity? Xiao Zhan had made it clear months ago that their friendship had not been as important to him as it was to Yibo, that it was easy for him to not have Yibo in his life. But Yibo had had to consciously work on moving on from being Xiao Zhan's friend, to no longer being welcome in his gege's life. In the summer of 2018, he had foolishly thought that they would be forever-friends, bonded by this wonderful, intense and exhausting experience. And yet, the last few months had forced him to be alone with his thoughts, on a level that he hadn't ever had to, before the pandemic. As someone who got into this fast-paced industry at such a young age, people assumed that he understood how relationships worked in the world of public opinion and social media. No one realized that it was because he had been young when he started out, that he tended to get overly attached to persons he connected with, whether it was his UNIQ-hyungs or Zhan-ge. The forced quarantine was a welcome opportunity to clear his head, to evaluate who his real friends were, and who he can rely on. It was a good time to grow up.

But growing up also meant facing things that were bothering him, and right now, Xiao Zhan was definitely bothering him. He did not need to get caught up in whatever drama the older man was trying to start. So he hit 'call'.

Xiao Zhan felt like his brain would explode from the sharp rings emanating from his phone. Whatever time it was, it was way too early for him. He accepted the call, ready to tell his manager that he had the day off and he was in no mood to-

"Xiao Zhan?" It sounded exactly like Yibo. Was this a dream? But why would Yibo call him Xiao Zhan in his dream?

"Hello?" Xiao Zhan asked softly, as if speaking loudly would dissipate whatever hallucination he found himself in.

"Are you okay? What's up with you?"

"I'm fine!" Xiao Zhan all but squeaked. "How are you doing?"

"What? I'm not- I'm not exchanging pleasantries, Zhan-ge. What's with all the texts?" Yibo snapped.

"Huh?" Xiao Zhan ignored the relief he felt when he heard that familiar endearment. "What are you talking about?"

"You sent me a bunch of texts last night?" Yibo hesitated. "Or was someone playing a joke? Were you hacked?"

Bits and pieces of last night started coming back to Xiao Zhan and he couldn't help but groan. "No, that was me," he said without thinking about it. "I guess I was a bit too drunk."

"Okay," Yibo stretched out the word in confusion. "Is that it? Were you being random?"

This was an out. Xiao Zhan could feel that Yibo wanted this, whatever this was, to end so that he could go back to being unbothered by Xiao Zhan's seemingly erratic behaviour. He started to deny that the texts had any deeper meaning than drunk ramblings but he stopped himself. Being dishonest was what triggered this whole mess. Trying to act cool, aloof, mature, whatever he thought he should be. What he had ended up being was a lying coward.

"I just missed you. A lot." He sighed. "I have been missing you for months now, and when I saw you hanging out with hi- with your friends, I texted you and I didn't realize how weird I must sound."

"Oh." Yibo cleared his throat as if that would help him come up with some kind of appropriate response to this... admission? Xiao Zhan doesn't say things like that. I missed you, just like that, with complete sincerity, no rainbow farts in sight.

Xiao Zhan wanted to strangle himself as if the words would come back into his throat that way. Clearly, he had fucked up. Again.

"We can hang out, then," Yibo mumbled. "Just like old times."

Xiao Zhan exhaled, without realizing that he was holding his breath. "That would be great! What do you want to do?"

"Um, we could have dinner this weekend?," Yibo suggested. "I'll ask the others on the group chat."

Wait, what? Xiao Zhan tilted his head and gasped when it dawned on him. "The CQL chat." It wasn't a question and he couldn't keep the disappointment out of his voice.

"Yep." Yibo did not want to get into what that gasp meant, or why Xiao Zhan sounded so.. glum? This needed to end, one way or the other. He hung up with a cursory 'bye!' and sent a text on the CQL group chat. Within minutes, Yu Bin and Xuan Lu were on board. Ji Li joined in and everyone began to rapidly text suggestions for places that were COVID-compliant. He ignored the conversation; he had done his part.

A few hours later, he was scrolling through the gaggle of texts to check if they had all figured out a destination, when he saw it. Xiao Zhan's text, and he almost spit out the beer he had been sipping.

Xiao Zhan: Is everyone okay with partying at my place? We can get wild haha, I don't have any neighbours.

No one had disagreed and Yibo hadn't been there to dissuade them. And that's how he ended up agreeing to go to Xiao Zhan's house.