After getting our McMeals, we went back to our temporary home. Domo cussed me out multiple times for no reason.
"Blue you too noticeable, you gotta switch it up" Mint said out of nowhere as we lounged around the living room.
"Whatchu' mean?" I questions while cocking my head to the side.
"Bitch..... you got a big ass blue Afro. The fuck you mean what I mean." He stale faced me.
"All I'm saying is, you got green eyes and Domo like 6'4. Wear some contacts and knock this nigga knee caps off then we can talk. The fuck." Cause WHO about to change it up?
"Bitch I'll kill you" Domo interjected.
"Bitch you been said that. That's why y'all gang getting clapped like flies." I stuck my tongue out, he lunged at me and I took off.
When I made it to the kitchen I scrambled around trying to find the silverware drawer, due to the jolly fucking green giant chasing me. As soon as I saw a sliver of silver, I grabbed the first piece I saw in hopes it was a fork, or at least a butter knife.
It was a teaspoon.
Domo continued chasing me till he had me in a corner, I raised my spoon and he laughed.
I furrowed my eyebrows and spoke; "I'll scoop yo eyeballs out hoe quit playing with me." This ain't no mothafuckin' game !
"She can't fight but she got the strength of a crack head, I think she'll do it." Mint chimed in from the doorway, just watching. Domo took my moment of distraction and grabbed me by the front of my shirt.
"Nigga! Help! The fuck!" I shrieked as I was drug towards the kitchen counter, Domo opened a drawer and pulled out some scissors.
GASP.
He WOULDNT!
"I would." He simply said as he reached the scissors towards my mane.
A sudden surge went through me, like I took a bean (XO, or smacker depending on where you're from) and drunk 3 bottles of water. I flipped my spoon around to the handle and jabbed it into his neck causing him to let go of me.
I flipped the spoon the right way and popped him in the nose with it and hissed.
Yes, yes I did hiss.
If you can't whoop me about it then don't speak about it. Disregard my last fight if you want to, ill fuck you up.
"Maybe we can come to a compromise?" Mint suggested while sitting on a barstool just watching the spectacle.
"And what might that be? Domo want me to be a bald bitch like him." I glared at him he huffed.
"Bitch I got a fade." He responded whilst rubbing his hand over his barely there ass waves.
Nigga got puddles.
"A bald fade? Milk dud head ass lil' boy" I Joked with him, followed by dodging a big can of Bush's Baked Beans he threw at me.
"Anyways, my suggestion, since I know lil' psycho aint getting rid of the blue hair. Maybe we do a different blue." Mint voiced.
"The bitch already round' here looking like blues clues and you want to do another damn blue?" Domo gave him a stale face.
"Y'all know blue was a girl right?" They ignored me.
Bastards.
"Im thinking like a midnight blue, something dark enough to not stand out too much but blue enough so young crippette wont try and kill herself." Im glad he know that would be my next course of action, I am NOT one of Gods strongest.
"Still not a crip"
"We don't care." was the response I got from both, and here I thought Mint was kind of fond of me. Niggas are so fake.
After I confirmed that a darker blue wouldn't be the end of the world (perhaps), we loaded up Mints still incredibly raggedy bat mobile to head to a drug store. My question is, if these niggas got so much money, why they didn't get a rental.
Never mind I spent all they money so this one might be on me.
As we walked into the local CVS, I wandered off per usual. I had a taste for something sweet after eating Mcdonalds.
That's how you know my back big and if you agreed with me then yours big too.
As I'm reaching for the last bag of Haribo gummy bears, another hand reached to grab them. We grabbed the bag at the same time and I looked up and made eye contact with the culprit.
Nobody other than the blue bandit from Mcdonalds, Abi. The quiet one.
"If you know what's best for you, you'll unhand my shit my boy." I told him.
"Naw' lil' one, please know I'll crash out behind these muhfuckers' here." He matched my intensity.
I like this guy.
"Abraham please don't piss me off, I've been kidnapped, beat up, started a housefire, lost my horse, don't have my dog, hundreds of miles away from home, and I'm not mentally stable." I deadpanned, which actually got him to let go of the gummy bears. He threw his hands into the air in a defeated motion.
As he opened his mouth to speak again, Domo and Mint came around the corner continuously talking shit. As usual.
"All I'm saying is, if we killed her life would be easy."
"Nigga you always want to kill somebody."
"And you never want to kill nobody."
"I don't know I think she kinda' funny. She probably wore a helmet in school but funny still."
"I bet you she had 3 teachers and stayed in the same classroom all day."
"I bet-" Mint cut his self short as he looked up at me and Abi, as we looked at them.
"This is the company you keep?" Abi asked be surprised. I shrugged my shoulders.
"God be testing me big bruh." I simply replied.
"So they real deal kidnapped you." Abi asked warily.
I said "Yes." at the same time Mint said "No." and Domo said "What's it to you fuck nigga."
Goodness gracious.
YOU ARE READING
Odd Ball
Humor"It's all blue over here cus." _______ In which a black girl who's favorite color is blue, embarks on an epic journey-slash-kidnapping after being mistaken for a Crip. ________ A/N: Bear with me, I started this story young so it's incredibly sloppy...
