Chapter 4

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   Zander kept pacing back and fourth. Countless thoughts were racing in his head. "I shouldn't have yelled so much. Does Luke still love me? Did I ruin everything? I should've kept quiet" were some of the thoughts that repeated over and over in his head. He had a heated argument with Luke back in the school's computer lab and now he really regretted it. He loved Luke with all his heart but now he was starting to think that Luke lost interest in him because of everything he said. The library was quiet,it usually had more people but most of them were outside at parks and such,enjoying the beautiful day. Zander couldn't enjoy the day. The sun was shining bright and the skies were blue,but Zander felt dark and gloomy inside. His footsteps were quiet as he paced across the carpeting of the library floor.

He stopped and sighed. "I really messed it up this time" Zander whispered to himself. He looked up to see which section he was in. Great,couldn't be any better. He was in the romance section of the library. All Zander wanted to do was grab a book and hit his head against it until he felt numb,but he didn't do it because the few people that were here would think of him as weird. He looked all around him. He was the only one in the romance section of the library and it was pretty quiet too. Now was the chance to let out his feelings. Zander sat down in a dark corner and stared at the floor. His thoughts began to race faster,which he hated. He hated being an over thinker,he hated feeling this way but he knew he couldn't avoid it. Tears began to roll down his cheeks and before he knew it,he was softly crying. Zander covered his face with his hands so people couldn't tell he was crying. The carpet was starting to get stained with a couple of tears but that didn't stop Zander.

Zander wasn't sure how long it had been before he heard footsteps coming closer. He immediately turned his head up and wiped his eyes. He grabbed the closest book by him and pretended like he was reading it. The low light of the library was perfect for Zander. Not extremely bright like the classrooms,but not total darkness either. The footsteps were getting closer.
"Zander? Is that you?" a female voice asked. Zander's eyes widen in shock. He shook his head a couple of times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. That voice sounded a lot like his long time friend Bella.
"So it is you Zander! I'm so happy to see you!" Bella yelled out happily as she ran towards Zander. Zander gulped. He wasn't prepared to socialize with anyone. Before he could even react,Bella already sat down next to him and made eye contact. She was smiling wide which made sense. The two of them were good friends in middle school but they hadn't talked since 8th grade ended because they went to different high schools.

"H-hey" was all that Zander managed to say. His voice was shaky as he tried hard not break down into tears again. He was trying to shove all his thoughts in the back of his head so he wouldn't feel even worse. Bella frowned.
"What's wrong Zander? You look pretty down in the dumps" she said as she reached out to hold Zander's hand. Bella was always very caring towards people and she could easily pick up on their feelings. That was one thing Zander wished Bella wasn't able to do because he didn't want to talk about it. He was still in pain after everything that happened. Zander looked at Bella and shook his head.
"I'm fine,don't worry about it" he said,forcing a smile upon his lips.Bella sighed.
"Alexander,you know better than to go around hiding your feelings like that. I can tell something's wrong and I want to help" she said,her tone of voice now sounded serious. Zander made eye contact with her,which he wish he didn't do. Bella's dark eyes pierced into him,making him feel like he had to say something.
"I had an argument with Luke. He's going to a different for college and I don't want that. I regret arguing with him because he probably doesn't love me anymore after that,but I still love him with all my heart" Zander managed to say. A few people walked by,saw how upset Zander looked,and left. Others gave him a pitiful expression. Bella looked at Zander worriedly.

"I see so you and Luke finally started dating after all those years. Well I know how arguing with your loved one feels like. You should go to Luke and tell him how you feel" Bella said as she came closer and hugged Zander. Zander just sat there,not knowing what to do. He never really liked hugs unless it was Luke giving him a hug. But another part of him felt like he really needed someone to comfort him. He just sat there,completely frozen.
"I.....I regret it but I still feel angry about Luke lying to me about what college he's going and the fact he didn't tell me sooner. I don't what I should feel" Zander mumbled. A couple of tears started to roll down his cheeks again. They rolled down onto Bella's dark blue hoodie but she didn't mind.
"It's okay to be confused on what to feel Zander. I can understand why you're angry but think about it. Luke wouldn't stop loving you just because he's far away" Bella said with a gentle voice.
"But what if he finds someone else?! I won't be there to spend time with him! We'll become more distant and he'll get closer to someone else!" Zander suddenly snapped as he pushed away from Bella's hugged. His eyes widen when he realized what he did.
"I'm sorry" Zander said as he looked at Bella.

Zander's expression made him seem like a small,sad,and scared child. His eyes were red and distant,his skin paler than usual,and his face darkened. Bella knew Zander was really hurt and she wasn't going to leave until he felt better.
"It's okay Zander,I know you didn't mean that but you have to understand something. Do you have faith and trust in Luke?" She asked as she put on a serious expression. Zander looked at her confused. Faith and trust in Luke? Of course he had faith and trust in Luke. Why did Bella ask that question? Zander nodded his head and said "Of course I do."
"Well because you have faith and trust in Luke,you need understand that he wouldn't leave you for anyone else. You should know that he won't cheat on you either. He hasn't found anyone else throughout all the years he's liked you so I highly doubt he's going to find someone else now" Bella said with a serious voice. She was serious about these sort of things and she knew Zander had to get this through his head.

"I understand,I should've realized that earlier. I'm just so scared. I'll be lonely without him. He's the peanut butter to my grape jelly you know?" Zander said as he gave a small smile to Bella. Bella smiled in return and nodded.
"I know,you're so used to Luke being around you but it isn't the end of your relationship. It won't be the last time you see him" she said as she stood up. She had gotten tired of sitting. Zander,however, stayed sitting in the corner of the romance section. He looked away and cleared his throat.
"I told him that we might have to take a break" he said with a voice so shaky,Bella was sure Zander was going to burst into tears again. Sure enough,hot tears began rolling down his eyes again. He wiped them furiously as he hated being vulnerable.
"Zander,it's okay to cry,to feel this way. Do you really want to take a break or did you just say that out of anger and impulse?" Bella asked with a gentle voice.

Zander stopped wiping his tears and looked up at Bella.
"I still want our relationship. I said it out of too much anger at the moment. Why do I always mess things up?!" Zander yelled out as he punched the bookshelf. The sound was loud and many books fell from the shelf,some hitting Zander in the process. A librarian rushed over.
"Young man,you better clean up the mess you made!" she said with a rude voice as she looked at Zander angrily. Bella death glared the librarian and Zander simply nodded. The librarian walked away,muttering under her breath about wreck less teenagers could be. Zander quietly stood up and looked down at all the books he knocked down.

"Zander you don't mess things up. We're all human so mistakes do happen but making it right is what's important" Bella said as she walked closer to Zander. Zander looked over at Bella with teary eyes. That's when his phone beeped. Zander was so surprised that he jumped back. Bella chuckled a bit and told Zander to check his phone. Zander reached into his pocket,got his phone out,and read the text he had gotten. It was from Luke.
Luke was telling him to meet him at the park tomorrow because he needed to talk about it.
"Luke says he needs to talk to me about it and that he wants us to meet at the park. Do you think this is a good thing?" Zander asked as he looked up from his phone. Bella had a huge smile on her face.
"Good thing? That's a great thing! That means Luke wants to fix things too! I suggest you think about what you want to say to him" she said,keeping that huge,bright smile. Zander smiled and nodded.

"Yeah I guess you're right. It is time to make things right" he said with a small smile. Bella chuckled.
"Now let's pick up these books first and then I can help you think about what to say" she said as she gestured towards the books. They crouched down and started picking up the books. Zander's heart was beating faster but it felt warm. He was relieved that Luke also wanted to fix things.

He was going to make sure that this wasn't the end of their relationship.


A/N:Hey guys,before there's any questions,Bella is a fan-made character. Zander doesn't have a confirmed middle school friend name Bella but I wanted him to have some interactions with someone outside of the cast we know. The next chapter will be the final chapter ^^




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