Two ear's and a Tail

34

why? why must he put himself in so much pain with his thoughts, "Devlin-" Nathen, one of my loves fathers places his hand on my shoulder, i've learnt that he's the softer of the two, more kind, sweeter, he holds a glass of blood in front of me, but instead of feeling hunger, the want and need to inhale the sweet, matalic taste of blood...i feel sickend by it, "you must drink it!" he says firmly, but my stomach turns.

"no-" my voice is so emotionless, "i need him!" i whisper, his tail is motionless, it always has moved, even while he slept, it's got it's own mind, and his ears, always spinning around to be the first to catch any type of sound. his eyes remain shut, and that's the worst part, his beautiful eyes, i noticed for some time now that he has Aidan's eyes, however their more vibrent then his fathers, so much more powerful, the blue eye and the red eye, the blue brighter then the sky, but also deeper then the ocean, the red nothing like mine, the colour of pure love and never changes, no matter how angry or how cold he feels, they only get brighter with the happier he feels, and to describe how much i miss them will take longer then the eternity i have lived.

i don't know what he was like before i met him, but when i did, i hated him. his attitude, he was so rude and inconsiderate, no respect for others, no...it was all an excuse. my heart has never beated so fast, never once in my long life and i was so pissed off at how confused i was of it, but i had a duty to protect my home from people i thought he was like, but when i held myself above him, leaning in...i smelt the pure desire, lust, passion, strength, weakness.... our lips connecting, i felt the need, the want, the have to have...and the sparks like being electricuted, the type that gives you power, i was pissed off more then anything when he ran away, i thought i would have cried if i didn't get to him quick enough and even so...i heard his thoughts, his thoughts of regret, the punishment he is always putting himself through, the painfulness of his thoughts...it hurt me.

"if you don't drink it i'll have to force it down your throat, Devlin!" Aiden walks through the door, he's tougher, less respectful to how people may feel, he still respects their feelings, but if he thinks something should be done he'll do it, he was the one who put that damn cage on my dick because he knew we'ed both regret it if Ashley got pregnant after only a short time of knowing me...but it may be short, but every second with him is stretched out into hours just so i can be with him for as long as possible, "how do you think he'll react if he woke up to see you as you are?" he says, his frustration showing through, but i just look at Ashley's lifeless form, his feet are far from the foot of the bed and his head is far from the head. 

"you can't just starve yourself, Devlin, if he wakes up, he'll be so worried, but he wont be strong enough to let you feed!" my hands turn to fists.

"is that why you think i stay in this room?" i say through gritted teeth.

"no, we know why you stay, but you need to feed and if he sees you like this his first instinct will be to make you feed from him, to see your mate pained is more painful then a slow, merciless death for werewolves!" Nathan says carefully and i begin to shake with anger.

"and you don't think i feel the same way?!" i ask, my voice raising.

"please, Devlin, for Ashely, eat, even if later in the day you throw it back up, as long as you digest some of this blood!" you can tell they are worried for Ashley, i haven't let anyone stay in the room like i have, i haven't showered, i haven't eaten, i haven't even brushed my teeth and the absence of food and drink means i don't need to use the labratory, which means more time by Ashley's side.

"hay, Devlin!" someone says, so joyfully as they step behind me i growl.

"How dar-ugh-"

"That's it, drink up!" the Alpha's pin me down against the chair, while Zurie and Jack force blood into my mouth, and a lot of it, half of it falling down the side of my face, the sickness rises, it increases so much i  feel like i'm going to throw up right now, but they continue to force the blood into my system, i then feel a prick on my arm and see a needle, red liquid pushing into my veins.

no, i don't want it, i can't have it, IT'S NOT ASHLEY'S "STOP!" i hear someone gasp and they all let go of me, i roll onto my side, pulling the needle out before rushing out of the room for the first time this month into the toilet, connected to the room, i throw up all of the blood forced down my throat, those bastards, i can't have any other blood you assholes, i don't want any other blood, no blood is as good as Ashleys, Ashleys blood is like your most favourite food that you couldn't ever get tired of while everyone elses is your least favourite food, theirs nothing in between, it only get's fouler, and the longer you go without your favourite food, the harder it is to let go and stop eating, and i'm terrefied, i can't eat until Ashley is strong, so strong that all i'd do is put him to sleep for the night, if i feed from him now that i haven't for a whole month on anything, it'll make his coma longer, it could put him further in, "Devlin!" i hear someone whimper as i pant, looking into the now red bowl..wait, that voice.

i let out the shakiest breath i can, turning slowly around, "A-A- your- gratias ago domino quoniam misericordiae" i cry, dropping to the floor on my hands and knees, "amica mea, et rediit ad me ut expendas diebus nostris nos ex hoc conscious!" i hold the bottom of his shirt, looking up to him, "Promitto, numquam reliquisset lateri tuo latere numquam!" i pray to him, my heart feeling like it's shattering.

"Devlin-" his eyes well with tears, his tumb running over my bloody jaw.

"the blood-" i gasp and drop my head, "dimitte me petisses tueri difficilius venas cibus soluisti meque alienis!" i beg, my mind going completely numb, not thinking of anything but the need for his forgivness and love.

"i love you, but i can't understand you!" he says and i let go of his shirt.

"quid agis, mea?" i look up to him, oh- my eyes widen, "i'm sorry, please, forgive me, i didn't realise!" i say shakily but then he grips my face, pulling it up to look into my eyes.

"how long has it been since you last drank blood?" he says sinserly, "you've gotten so weak, Devlin!" his eyes well with tears again and my heart breaks.

"Amica mea, i'm sorry, but i can not feed from mere blood, it sickens me!" i shut my eyes, still tasting the blood, "but i will drink the blood given to me if you wish, Amica mea!" i say softly, like a pesant talking to his master, he falls to his knees and pulls me to him, putting his neck in front of me, i stomach begs for it, my teeth growing longer, "Amica mea!" i whisper, "i can't!" i say, shaking, trying to will myself not to feed from my already weak love, "i won't stop!" i cry, but i keep moving to it, "it's like you eating Gamon for the first time, Amica mea, i can't, it'll hurt you more then it's worth, please, i beg of you, please, i'll drink the other blood, i'll hurt you beyond repair, ple-" i feel something cut into my neck, shock runs through me as i feel pain and pleasure all at once, he pulls out, me frozen.

"drink from my fucking vein!" he growls so powerfully that i am compelled to, i sink my teeth into his vein, the juiciest part of him, the flavour, the pleasure, the need, i grip the back of his head, pulling his body closer to me, my teeth sinking further and further in.

"Devlin!" i hear someone warn but i can't pull away, "DEVLIN!" they shout before i feel that same prick on my neck again...is he- is he feeding from me? the same grip i have on him he returns it all pushing me further against his neck like he's begging for me to feed from him, but as i continue to feed from him i notice myself, even though i begin to live up again, i become weaker, exhaustion creaping into my mind, slowing my meal down, before i stop completely, i pull away so tiredly and i feel him pull away when he find's i have, "oh my god-" i fall into him.

"i promise, i didn't drink your blood, well, maybe a bit, but i'm just borrowing your strength so you can feed from me, i'll repay you once you tell me what you said before!" he says softly, but i don't answer...i love you, Amica mea, "i love you too, my love!" i'd be questioning him wether he's mocking me with calling me his love after he told me he doesn't understand me, or he ganually wanted to call me his love, but i'm exhausted, "your thoughts are as clear as day while your in a state like this-" he begins, "i'd of thought i'd be the weaker one, but at least i still got fluids into my system, never starve yourself like that again!" he says the last part firmly and i just smile.

"ego polliceor mea!" i hum before we are both dropped onto a bed.

"so romantica, but, now your both weak, so you both sleep!" i hear Zurie say, "Devlin?" i don't look, "you did good!" he says and i smirk, feeling so greatful and warm for that.

"thank you, my lord!" i breath out so tiredly before finally falling to sleep, warpped in my mates arms while my arms are wrapping him up too.