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Eleven

Later that night I found myself sitting cross legged on my bed, wondering if I'd get a goodnight text from Gerard. I wondered vaguely if he was doing the same thing, trying to decide if he would send one or not. Honestly, what happened wasn't even that big of a deal and the longer I sat there, hunched over with my hand holding my chin, the more childish I felt. We hadn't talked in 4 hours and I wanted too. But, what happened was all my stupid fault and I didn't know if Gerard had simmered down or not. I didn't want to remind him or anything.

I laid on my stomach and my mind churned over possible texts I could send. I mean, was he mad at me? I could just send goodnight but that sounds way too hostile still. I could say goodnight gee but... nothing would get solved from that. I could ask if he was mad at me but that would just make me seem whiny and babyish. I wasn't going to say we'd go to my school's valentine's day dance because I didn't want to go. The last time I went to a dance, I was kicked in the stomach. I understand it was kind of stupid, but that happened because I did something stupid. I kissed a guy. A popular guy that I thought wanted to kiss me too, and it was the stupidest thing I've ever done... and it was why I found dances dumb.

I wound up falling asleep and when I woke up, I still had no new notifications from Gerard. I did have comments on some pictures where I had written a poem as the caption but those are always a constant.

This whole dance thing was overrated anyway and I didn't understand why Gerard wanted to go so badly. Maybe I was being really stubborn and dumb. It was just a dance. We didn't have to stay the whole time. Plus, what happened last time honestly had no chance of happening this time, but still. The atmosphere would be so boring. If you actually take a chance and dance, you get made fun of. I don't want to be a part of that.

But if it makes Gerard happy I should just do it. Who knows? I may even enjoy myself because I have him with me. It might bring us a bit closer or some lovey dovey crap like that. It might help me overcome my whole 'I hate that the school knows I'm gay now' thing. I thought about all this as I went on throughout my day (with nothing from Gerard still) and just chose to call him right after school ended. I was walking up the bus's steps and almost tripped when Gerard said, "Hey, Frankie."

Frankie. He used my nickname - which means he isn't angry still! Score for Gerard not being a whiny bitch like me!

I blushed and duck my head down, sitting in the first seat. "Hey. First thing's first, I'm sorry for acting stupid. Seriously. I still hate dances but... will you go to my dance with me?" I squeezed my eyes shut and hoped I wouldn't get rejected because he might not actually be over it and would tell me how idiotic I had been and that he really didn't want to go or come down here anymore.

But instead I got, "Yes! I try on tuxedos now!"

I smiled and let out a loud sigh. "I'm sorry." I apologized again.

"And I'm sorry. I mean, I didn't even ask why you didn't want to go, you know? I just assumed you just really didn't want to go with me..." I heard something ruffle on his end of the line. "Gerard, that's so dumb. You're my boyfriend."

"I know!" He whined.

"I'd want you to do everything with me."

"Even take a shower?" I could hear him smiling and I laughed. "Yes."

"Holding you to that."

"Can't wait." I giggled. I leaned my head against the window and kept smiling as I stared out of it. "Are you mad at me because I didn't text you afterwards?" I mumbled. I needed to know. If I didn't get an answer it'd keep eating away at me.

"No. Are you mad at me?"

"No."

"Aww. You're so cute." He sighed. "I can't wait to see you again."