His EX-HUSBAND (Forthbeam)

5:What have I done?

beam was waiting for forth in front of the hospital for an hour now. It was really hard for him to go to that place again. The place from where his suffering start. It hurt him even more to see the person who was cause of his suffering. The person who believed on some documents over him. The person who called his own son bastard. He had thought he would never see his face again, but here he was waiting for that person for an hour. Beam's mind was running like crazy with different kind of thoughts. What if he didn't come? What will happen to his Hanie?

Beam was so tired mentally and physically that he sat there leaning on the wall, hugging his knees to his chest. People were giving him weird looks but he was used to them now. He was so sad but there were no tears coming from his eyes. The only thing he was doing after finding that his bone marrow wasn't compatible with Hanie was crying. It was second time in his life when he cry because he is orphan. If only, he could have blood related family, then he wouldn't have to go to that person, begging him to donate his bone marrow.

Suddenly a car halt in front of him, taking him out of his trance. He rushed forward as he saw forth coming out. He guide forth to the room where his test would be taken. He called the nurse and she take forth into the room, telling beam to wait outside. After what felt like half an hour forth came out. (I don't know how these medical things work, so please bear with it)

Forth pov

I am late nearly by an hour. After beam left, I was so angry on myself. I does the same mistake again after years. I humiliate him, degrade him. After years I met him and instead of hugging him and telling him how I missed him, I humiliate him. At this point I don't care what he had done in past. If I can't be with him, I will watch him from afar. Supporting him. When beam was in relationship with me, he never asked me anything. Now in first time he asked me something and I did a horrible thing to him. I sometimes really hate myself. Why my anger always took over me.

I am driving fast, if I didn't get there on time. Beam will think I didn't love him when he was with me. But it's not true, he was my everything. I halt the car as soon as I saw beam sitting on a ground leaning on a wall. My heart break to see that condition of him. He looked so broken. I hurriedly went out and he run towards me, as soon as he saw me. He guided me in the hospital.

They told us to wait outside for two hours. I was sitting on a chair of waiting room in third row and beam was sitting in first row, near the door. He seems impatient about the result. He was tapping his feet's continuously. I still can't figure out why he want me to do that test. There is no way I could be compatible with that bastard son of his as he was not my child. But still I came to prove that I loved him.

I can't help but stare at his thin back figure. When I looked closer enough, I could see there are few holes in his worn out coat. People were sending him weird looks. Well he was the only one who was wearing such cloths on the floor as the hospital was hella rich, and probably cost fortune for treatment. So basically all people present here were rich and dressed in branded cloths, except beam. He must be feeling out of the place. If he was this short of money that he can't by decent coat then having his son's treatment in this kind of hospital was mystery to me. How could he afford this?

I was taken out of thought when He stand up and went out holding his phone in his hand. God, his phone also look outdated, just like his cloths. It's been 15 minutes and he still didn't came. Its only 5 minutes remaining for nurse to call us. I went out searching for him. It didn't take me long to find him. I hide myself when I saw he was leaning on the wall near the window talking to someone on phone. He was crying. It looks like whoever on phone was sympathizing him. As his cries subside down and cut the phone. He was about to come towards waiting room when a group of girls stopped in front of him. It seems like they were saying him names but I couldn't figure out what. Beam was looking like he was trying his best to get out of there but those girls couldn't let him. I went closer wanting to hear what was going on.

"Oh looks this is that beam. Whore husband of our forth."

"How could people like you even exist?''

"Bitch"

"Whore"

"He should die.''

"Where is that bastard son of yours you whore?"

Anger boiled inside me. How could they say that to him? It had nothing to with them? It's the matter between me and beam, there is nothing that concern them. I marched there taking long steps and grab beam's wrist dragged him inside the waiting room. I was so angry at him. He was taking those words without fighting them back. It was not like him. In past he would always ready to fight, even someone accidentally said any unpleasant thing to him.

forth: Don't you have voice? Why don't you fire back at them?

(I hissed on him, I was so irritated by his defeated behavior and his antique fashion. Who wear cap in the hospital? I couldn't even see his forehead because of that hat? He looked at me like I have said something terrible. He forcefully release his wrist from my hands. And looked at me with angry expression.)

Beam: Why are you shouting at me h? Because I didn't fight back there for myself? With how many people I could fight back Mr. Jaturapoom. Because, I clearly remember you were the one who declare me as whore in front of whole world. You were the one who bring this misery to me and my son. You were th-"

"Family of  Han Baramee"

(It was first time in my life I see beam like that. He was right I was the one who did this to him. Beam stopped when he heard nurse call that name. So that bastards name is Han. How beam could gave that name to that bastard. It was the name I picked personally for my son, beam knew that. Suddenly I got angry and about to snap at beam, when nurse call that name for second time and beam went inside to talk to doctor.)

The anger was raising inside me when I sat on the chair next to beam and in front of the desk of doctor. The doctor seems familiar with beam. He was eyeing me rather with angry eyes.

forth: Tell me the reports. I have no time for things like this.

Doctor gave me a look. God I am really hating that doctor now. Beam was silent whole time. It looked to me he could cry at any time if the doctor didn't tell the result soon. What's the point of waiting though? It will be incompatible as I am not that bastard's father.

Doctor: Well Mr., I am sorry I didn't remember your name. (I glared at him. he was doing it on purpose. Who the hell didn't know Forth Jaturapoom in the Thailand?)

forth: Mr. Forth. (I gave him a fake smile)

Doctor: So MR. forth. You should make time for this. As it's the life and death matter for your son.

Forth: Tsk, That bastard is not my son.

(forth  said with so much confidence, staring at doctor in eyes.)

Dr.: Oh really. But Mr. forth. I am sure he is your son, because the test won't be 100% percent compatible unless you are his biological father.

(The doctor smirked. He observed as forth's expression turn from confidence to confusion.)

forth: What? How could he? We did DNA test. He-

Dr.: Here the results. You can ask another doctor if you don't believe us.

The doctor throws a file in front of me. I was in shock. How could? I was shocked at the point I could feel the room spinning around me. I feel like I would faint anytime. I could see How beam was crying in relief that he found a compatible match and bowing to the doctor again and again, who also had few tears in his eyes. I couldn't stand there for another second. The past was coming back to me. The image of beam crying holding his son in front of me, how I humiliate him in front of media was all coming in front of my eyes, Shaking the ground beneath my feet. I run out of there, that hospital. How could I show my face to beam, after what I had done?

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