Love , Remus »» REMUS LUPIN✔

xi.

My dearest love Ophelia , 

It's been a week , I think. Or maybe four days. I have no idea. I haven't kept a track of time lately. I did not leave my dorm since they pronounced you dead.

I got diagnosed with lycanthropy when I was  six , and since  that day - I refrained from befriending people , letting them on my life , so that no innocent person's fate would be tied down with mine. 

But when it came to you , all that self-restraint went down the drain. And I regret it all so much.

I don't regret meeting you , Ophelia. You have taught me more about life than any book , or anyone else ever could. Your selflessness , loyalty and love for the world despite facing so many difficulties was what inspired me to embrace my disease.

I regret not loving you enough. I regret not telling you that I loved you when I had the time.

And when I woke up , to find you asleep with your head on the table - I was relieved for a moment to find you were still here with me. But then I realised you weren't breathing. Your pulse was fading by the minute , and all I could do was panic. 

I rushed you to the hospital wing , and I waited. I watched as Madame Pomfrey and several healers from St. Mungo's fussed over you , feeding you healing potions , drugs , muggle pills - anything to save you. Your parents were called , but I could not talk to them. I  couldn't show them the reason their daughter was dead.

Maybe if I hadn't fallen asleep , I could have made it faster. You would still be here with me , holding my hand and telling me that everything was going to be okay.

I read your poems , by the way , and I envy you for being so very talented. I also saw the picture you drew on the wall , of us - and I , I have no words. When I sat by it , I could feel your warmth next to me.

I cannot tell you now , but I can write in this letter all of my feelings. I love you Ophelia , more than the number of stars in the sky. I love you like I have never loved myself. I want to be grateful that you came to my life , and Fate painted my canvas with colours. With you , life was no longer bleak. I desperately wish to tell you all this , to feel your lips upon mine. 

But I didn't do this earlier , and time ran out.

You are no leaf , Ophelia. No rose , either. You are far greater , Ophelia. Far more wonderful and kind. I had fallen for you long before you knew me , and despite you being the moon - I decided to reach out and touch you.

Will you come back if I give up everything I have ? I don't want to live without you.

I just wish I could have let you know this sooner. I love you , and one day , we will meet again.

Love , 

Remus.

Remus Lupin let out a sigh , as his eyes drifted towards the rain drops that fell from the sky , upon the stone tomb that marked the grave of Ophelia Francis. Hardly anyone from Hogwarts attended her funeral , other than the Marauders and a few others Ophelia had conversed with from time to time. Reading the letter for what felt like the thousandth time , he reached forward to place it upon her grave , under the wreaths and thousand flowers.

A bitter sweet smile came upon his lips , as he looked out to the vast expanse of the mercury sky overhead.

"-But now that you are gone , my sky is grey once again , and the flowers , devoid of colour."