Vénéneux

8-know

⛔️⚠️Tw: self harm⚠️⛔️

"There are simpler ways to go about spells like this" I explained to Astoria while sitting in the library, we have a huge test coming up and she is everything but prepared.

"See if you just regulate your wand motion like this-" I showed her what I meant by using only my hand and she furrowed her brows before trying it herself

"No go slower, if you do it stiffly and aggressively it won't work the same. It might feel like you will achieve a stronger spell but in this case it is the opposite" I told her while guiding her hand until she got it.

"Okay but what about this on?" She mumbled

"Let's see" I said while reading about the one she was pointing to.

"Forget it! I'm late" she said hurriedly while grabbing all her things and papers that were scattered around.

"Wha- alright then, remember to practice the motions" l said after her and she brushed it off while doing small runs out of the library, my guess is she's meeting Nott.

"Have you tried wand leading?"

I jumped at the voice i hadn't realized was there. Granger.

"I didn't sorry, uhm no I haven't, I actually don't really know what exactly that is" I mumbled a bit flushed, is it something I'm supposed to know?

Her eyes softened at my somewhat vulnerability.

"it's not common knowledge, in fact it is rather forgotten" she stated and sat down at the seat Astoria was previously sitting in. She looked tense, as if she was placed in some fight or flight situation.

"Right" i coughed and searched for something, anything to fill the awkward silence with.

"It's like a game I suppose, with the wand. You trust it and when it trusts you the motion is simply a formality, it will do what you want it to whenever you give it the cue" she explained, and it made a lot of sense. Wands choose their owners, you don't waltz into a wand store and pick the prettiest one, far from it. So it knowing your intentions made an awful lot of sense.

"Id never even considered such thing" I stated dumbfounded, and she giggled genuinely making me smile as well.

"try it" she said and nodded excitedly.

I stared dumbly at her for a moment before gathering my wand. What spell should I even- wingardium Leviosa I decided in my mind, simple spell, and can't really cause any damage.

I put my quill in front of me and did a lazy version of the wand motion, but my brain was in overdrive, I ignored the ticking pain that I am certain is my not supposed to be there but i am almost sure I know what it's from.

I was surprised when the quill lifted even though I knew she was telling me the truth, that wand leading was a legitimate thing. Yet I couldn't help it, I stared at the quill with wide eyes.

"Good!" She said with approving nods.

"It's almost like wand less spells, just that it isn't" she said and scratched her head a bit.

"Thank you" I said awkwardly and glanced at her.

"I should.." she started, I knew what she was about to say as she scooted the chair out from the table and found the rems of her bag. I couldn't help but feel bad, did I make her feel like she had to leave? I am not a jealous person but it burns me in an unexplainable way when I lack knowledge on something, the approving nods she gave me as if it was to her merit that I had managed it. As if she was gloating because she did something great, when in reality it was me who did the spell, I did it on my own. It sounds sick and it is. I am sick, and I know it.