The one that got away

Chapter 1: On my own but not alone

As I walked to Portland State University's library tears started streaming down my face. Memories burst in my mind. Memories of my mother. I remembered the first time I came to this campus.

I had to spend the day with her because she was unable to find a babysitter for me. It had been her first day of work and so she couldn't miss it. I'll never forget the struggles she went through day by day as she tried to give me a better life.

I had always wanted many things in life, but the one thing I wanted most was for my mother to find love again. To find someone to give her joy and happiness when no one else could. But despite my wishes she always told me , " Emma, I was lucky enough to love once and blessed to be able to love you as well. You are that someone who gives me happiness and joy in my life."

My mother was my only parent. I had never met my father. He died while my mother was still pregnant with me. We had moved from California to Oregon when I was four years old. We stayed with my mother's longtime friend Jenna who we loved like family. A few months later my mother bought a house in Sandy a small town on the north side of Oregon. Everything around the house is forest, trees surrounding our property. The view from our porch is a large chain of green mountains that give us shade most of the day. The backyard reaches uphill where the sun shine upon our blessing of a garden. My mother and I had planted fruits, vegetables and flowers giving our home a beautiful look and aroma. We were happy there.

Years passed and I turned fifteen. My mother threw me a small party with some of her coworkers and a few of my friends from school. We had a wonderful time. My friend Maggie brought her kareoke machine. No one escaped Maggies's kareoke time. It had been a day to remember for years to come. It was the day I'd met him, my unforgettable first love.

Alexander Greif, was the youngest son of my mother's coworker, Alice. They lived in Portland, the city of roses. His father was a business man in the city. Alex have a brother who is six years older than him. His name was Rick and he had just gratuated from college. Right after, he moved to Seatle Washington where he got an offer to work as a flight engineer. Alexander was very proud of him.

Alex and I started to know each other and we spent a lot of time together. Our love for each other grew throughout the years and it was undeniable that we were meant to be. I can't denied that there are moments where we can't stand each other but what happens afterwards states otherwise.

We have being together for five years now and I still get goosebumps when he kiss me. He is the reason why I could go through a day like this without falling apart.

My mother is gone forever and it hurts in ways that I can't describe. I am on my own but not alone. At the end of each day when I feel like I can't go on , his arms are my support and his love is my strength.