When Secrets Run Out

Sun and Hope

Oliver's POV

    I should have surrendered back to slumber after finding my way to bed last night, but the distant and pained look in Elijah's eyes last night haunted the back of my eyelids until I forced myself to sit up, and open them to today instead of the night before.

I stand up from the bed, being sure the mattress doesn't move an inch, not ready to face an awakened Elijah if it does.

When I reach the long windows along the opposite side of my room, I find that the ground outside is slowly going back into the light, the paths almost clear now as the sun works overtime to clear away Nature's mess.

It's been over a week since the small human came stumbled into the snow along my path of sight, and ever since, he's been a reoccurring thought inside both my heart and head.

And I should be grateful that I even got the chance to meet my Mate, after years and years of lo ones and solitude. Though I never would admit it to anyone that doesn't share the same problems as I, the loneliness of being without family or peers for centuries tire at my sanity and happiness. Burned down my hope and faith in humanity. But with a few stuttered words and a knock on a large unknown door, my world was flipped around and everything seemed right as rain.

And I wonder, if my instincts for this being too good to be true, was more accurate that I wish it to be. I hear rustling behind me, and my body stiffens, quelling the urge to exit the room before he realizes I'm here.

Movement stops, and I hear a small sigh, a yawn, and just when I think I'll hear his voice asking me if I slept alright or what I'm doing awake so early, there's silence. Nothing but air and space between us as words stay within our mouths and mind, letting only our breaths pass our lips.

When he looked at me last night, he looked terrified. Scared. Broken. Unhappy. All the things I never wanted him to ever feel, especially from me.

And when I attempted to calm him and told him that he didn't need to be fearful of me, it seemed to create the opposite effect. It only seemed to make that look in his eyes worse, and I loathed every second of that moment. Those few seconds when I looked into his soft unfocused eyes after he woke up from the nightmare that had shaken me awake, railroaded me.

If I did this. Went through with taking Elijah into my arms and holding him there for long we please, then he would be taken advantage of. His whole life would be revolved around taking care of my secret. Of hiding and being wary of people the rest of his life, just because one of them could kill me, indict me, fear me and him, just because of who I was.

And I saw that fear reflected in his eyes last night, staring right back at me.

I look outside, the inch of snow left on the ground, and clear my throat, opening my mouth to say the words right on the edge of my tongue. But they don't come, stuck in my throat, waiting for me to have the guts to give away the most prized possession that had ever crossed my path.

I knew reading White Fang would come in handy.

I try to give myself a joke, something to tether myself to do I can do it, but I still fall short.

For centuries I have given up my wants, my desires and needs. For generations and ages, I've taken my own life and put it behind those of others, and for once, I've decided I'm no longer going to allow that to happen.

I turn around from the window, the prepared speech about driving him home for good blowing out of my mind. "I don't want you to be weary nor afraid of me, Elijah. I want you to be happy and content here. If I knew that meeting you would be this pleasant I would have aimed to do so years ago. I promise to never harm you. Just give me a chance."

The words flow out of my mouth like a waterfall, unlike earlier, and my chest feels like, and hope, the unfamiliar feeling, spreads through my body like a drug. Wishing. Praying.

His bed hair makes my hug tug in adoration, and his squinted eyes, the poor human blinded without his glasses, make my lips twitch. But the look of confusion and shock is what draws my attention. "I-I'm not scared of you. I would never be scared of you... but, you want me?" He asks me, as if truly shocked and I frown, walking my way towards him nervously, his scent caressing my nose and tongue.

"Dear Elijah, I have wanted you since I opened my door to your rosy face. You have captured my heart, and I wish for you to give me the chance to do the same for you." I urge, my conviction diminishing by the second at his lack of excitement.

His confusion doesn't go away as he bites his lip as if tying to decide whether to say it. Finally, he chooses. "But, I'm a human. I can't become a Vampire, and I-I don't know if I can leave my friends behind, or watch them die. I'm no good for you, I'm a terrible Bo-"

I silent the naive human with my hand on his cheek, stroking the soft skin slightly as I look at him. "You will never utter those words in my presence again. You are smart, kind, generous, funny, and gorgeous. Absolutely stunning." I watch in mild satisfaction as his cheek rose, the feeling warm and enticing against my hand. "I would never ask you to give your life up for me. Instead, for you, I'm willing to be anything you need me to. Even human. I adore you, my Elijah, and I'm not quite prepared to give you away."

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This is NOT how I was going to write this book, at all, but I'm finally happy at the direction it's going, bc what I had planned would be WAY too forced and busy. How do you guys like this?

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QOTD: Skittles or Starburst?