Black Hole

"When Rattlesnakes Lose Their Skins and Their Hearts"

The Black siblings could always talk to one another without a single word spoken.

Their eyes.

Their matching pale grey eyes were so often their mode of communication to each other. 

"Be quiet or you'll get in trouble." Her eyes would tell him.

"I'm going to fucking explode if I don't get out of this house." His eyes would tell her. 

"I'm sorry." His eyes would tell them.

Lyra-Jade wanted nothing more than to talk to her younger brother. She knew that if she did, it would have to be with her eyes.

However, at dinner, Regulus did not meet her gaze once. She had sat at the very end of the table, where no one ever sat. The closest person to her was a large distance away. She swirled her soup with her spoon, not listening to the welcome back and happy new year speeches, only trying to catch her younger brothers' eyes. But he was looking anywhere but the end of the table. 

Everyone seemed to be stealing glances at her, talking about her.

Everyone but her own brother.

"Did you hear what happened? Poor girl."

"You know what I say, good riddance. Her and SIrius, Merlin. Blood traitors by definition."

"How pathetic."

"She got disowned, she did. Just like Sirius. It's sad, really."

"Disgrace."

"I heard from Jackie Rosier that Lyra-Jade refused to marry her brother, and that's why she got kicked out."

"Well, I heard it had something to do with everything that's been going on. You know, the dark shit."

"No, no, I heard that the reason she got disowned is because she shagged like, ten muggles. No, really!"

"Little Lyra, are you sad? Oh, are you going to cry? Mummy and daddy kicked you out, did they?."

She sighed, bringing up one of her knees on the bench and resting her head on it. She brought a spoonful of soup and slurped. When she noticed other students starting to leave, she quickly stood, tugged up her cloak's hood, and strode out the great hall, ignoring the looks and whispers.

She was almost to the dungeons when she heard another set of hurried footsteps behind her. She grabbed her wand from her pocket and whirled.

"Hey! It's just me!" Her brother yelped, throwing his hands in the air.

She let out a breath. "R-Reg, you shouldn't...I m-mean, you should not be seen talking to me." 

He let out an angry sigh and stepped toward her hesitantly. "I don't care!" He scoffed and wrapped his arms around her.

He let out a sob.

"Hey, hey, s-stop, baby boy. It's a-a-alright."

"I didn't even do anything. I just let them hurt you."

She leaned back from his chest and reached up to take his face in her hands. "Regulus Black, y-you did just what I wanted you to do that night. Who bl-bl-bloody knows what they would have done to you, alright?"

He lowered his head.

"Reggie, come back to the P-Potter's with me this Summer, all right? You n-n-n-never have to-"

"I can't do that."

"Why? W-Why can't you? I could-"

He looked down at her with a sad smile. "I can't leave them."

Her dark brows furrowed. "Who? Who can you leave? M-Mother?" She scoffed, dropping her hands from his face. "Really, Regulus. After all-all she's done?"

He shook his head quickly and grabbed her hands. "No, no, it's not like that, LJ. It's just...I can't explain it."

"Try."

"I can't! LJ...I am...I'm in this too deep, alright? Things would be bad if I left."

Her heart stopped. "You're in what too d-deep?" Her voice was barely above a whisper. Her eyes dug into his forearm.

He followed her gaze. "No, it's not-"

She tore her hands from his and grabbed his arm. With a force she didn't know she had, she held his struggling arm and yanked up his cloak's sleeve.

It was blank. Pearly white, unblemished skin.

She met his wide eyes with confusion. His fell.

"Then what is it, R-Reg? What have you done? What have they made you do?" 

"I can't...I can't explain it. But I have to stay, alright? I'll be okay." Something about his small voice made her drop it.

They stood there for a moment in silence, her grip still hard on his arm. Her mind settled. She grabbed his shoulders and spoke it a rushed voice. "Now listen, and listen close, and don't interrupt." She explained to him that they were not to be seen with one another by any other students, and he was not to speak to or about her to anyone. "Anyone, do you u-u-understand? Not even Ezra." If they were to cross one another in the hallway, he is to look indifferent.

"But, why?"

"What did I say about interrupting? Because Reg, you are s-safe where you are right now, r-right?And if it got b-b-back to them that you were talking to me, you wouldn't be." 

"But when can I see you? I need to see you, LJ. I need you"

I need you. I need you. I need you. I need you.

So, because she was needed, they came up with a plan. She had something, something he didn't know about that she had found amongst family heirlooms when she was younger and that they could use to talk to one another. But, she told him, someone else has the other half, so she would need to get it and figure out how to get it to him.

***

A few weeks had passed, and things were strange.

Instead of seeing Sirius through the small charmed mirror, she saw Regulus. Instead of whispering to Sirius through the piece of glass each night, it was Regulus.

Sirius had begrudgingly handed over the other half, but not before insisting that if he were to hand it over, that Lyra-Jade had to stay in their dorm more nights than not. She accepted.

Most nights, she slept in her brothers bed, him curled up as Padfoot by her feet. She woke to a wet nose and sloppy tongue on her face. She ate with them, went to class with them, smoked with them, studied with them, sat with them, lazed around with them.

Them, them, them. Her boys.

Words were still being tossed her way. Some simple whispers, many not. Sirius and James had detention almost every night.

Letters came almost daily from both Andy and Mia.

Her head still hurt, and she still stuttered her way through each sentence. She woke up the entire dorm room some nights with her screams, which were almost always preceded by vomiting. She fell asleep in class constantly and barely turned in her work, but none of her professors ever gave her detention. They gave her pitied glances and extensions on assignments.

She struggled, but she also felt...content. Something she didn't think she had ever truly felt before. She felt safe and warm and loved.

But good things never seemed to last for Lyra-Jade.

***

"I am a dead woman, and I don't care."