I jumped - MariChat ( miraculous ladybug )

Chapter 5

getting me settled into my own room and onto my bed was torture. I was already in a lot of pain and being moved around a lot was not helping in the slightest. Adrien ended up having to go home right as we were leaving the hospital because his dad needed him for something but I didnt mind. i'd much rather he didnt see me like this. i had my brace on underneath a hoodie and it was so uncomfortable but i knew i needed to wear it. Tikki was hiding in my hoodie and was hugging me hoping to bring some comfort to an otherwise miserable day. 

Once I was settled into bed I convinced my parents to go open the bakery and I would be fine just resting all day, they were hesitant but after an hour of reassuring they finally left me alone. As soon as they were gone I just stared up at the ceiling. What the hell did I do? I tried to give up my miraculous, I worried Chat Noir, I was worrying everyone. I jumped off the balcony. Holy shit I jumped. I jumped off a balcony. Why don't I feel bad? I mean I hate myself, I was weak enough to jump off a balcony, I was worrying everyone by how stupid I am. Maybe if I jumped from a higher place...  I'd stop worrying everyone all the time if I did. 

"Marinette? Are you alright?" shit Tikki can't know I was thinking about that. 

"yeah Tikki, I'm just going to try to sleep now,"

"I'm gonna go talk to master, I'll be back soon," I hummed as I fell asleep and Tikki flew out the window

========================

I woke up to knocking on the window, who the hell is here this late? I carefully sat up in bed and pushed the window open to see a certain black cat. 

"Marinette hey are you okay?" I didn't reply as I was trying to lay back down in bed without making the pain any worse,

"Princess? Are you alright?" he put a hand on my shoulder just as I laid down, I let out a breath,

"m'fine kitty," his grip tightened on my shoulder and I failed to hold back a whimper, his hand immedietly left my shoulder and I looked away. I could feel his eyes on me, begging me to look at him but I couldn't. Even if he didn't know I was ladybug I can't let my partner see me as weak. Even though I am. I'm weak. 

"I never got to ask, what's the damage?" he put his hand on my chin and tried to force me to look at him. I let him. His beautiful green eyes looked into mine and I got lost in them. His eyes had specks of darker green and turquoise but I could see the concern laced through them,

"Princess? You in there? What's going on in there lately?" I shut my eyes, I can't look at him, please. I love Adrien. Not Chat, I can't love Chat. Chat kept moving as he tried to get comfortable and I couldn't take him shaking the bed anymore,

"Chat please stop moving," I felt him instantly stop but when I looked up he looked so uncomfortable, he was sitting straight up and he looked extremely guilty,

"no, Chat it's alright. I'm sorry. You can get comfortable. I'm already in pain so you can just do it now," he hesitated but eventually he laid down next to me, making sure he didn't touch me. I tried to hold them back but tears rolled down my cheeks as pain radiated throughout my body. I hoped Chat wouldn't notice but alas fate wouldn't have it as I felt Chat wipe my tears,

"you never answered the question. What's the damage?" I sighed and looked up to meet his eyes,

"couple broken ribs, lots of bruises, broken wrist, internal bruising, sprained ankle, slightly fractured spine," what was that look? What's wrong? Is that... guilt? 

"Chat, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He put a hand on my broken wrist, the black contrasting the bright pink of the cast,

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have left that night. If I hadn't left you wouldn't be hurt right now," he thinks it's his fault? 

"Chat, it's not your fault, I did this. Not you," wait. shit no he can't think I did it on purpose

"n-not that it was on purpose I-I-I just meant that it was my fault I'm so c-c-clumsy," Chat raised an eyebrow,

"What really happened?" 

"I told you, I slipped and fell over the railing," Chat sighed but thankfully he didn't say anything else but his eyes never left mine, his beautiful beautiful green eyes and his delicious round pink lips.. No. Marinette stop. You're disgusting. I looked back up to Chat's eyes getting lost in them again, his eyes flicked down to my lips, he leaned in. His eyes fluttered closed. Wait what? No, I love Adrien. Don't I? But if I love Adrien why am I not pulling away? He pressed his lips against mine. Butterflies errupted in my stomach, I forgot all about Adrien. All I could think about was how Chat's lips felt on mine. How soft his lips were. What do I do? He pulled away and opened his eyes,

"I'm sorry Princess, I've been wanting to do that for a while," I bit my lip. What do I do? 

"Chat?" His hand cupped my cheek,

"Can I kiss you? Again?" I nodded and once again he captured my lips with his. I kissed back this time, the kiss was magical, it felt so right. Our lips fit perfectly together like a puzzle. The kiss only lasted a few seconds before he pulled away. No wait we can't do this, he'll only be hurt more when I'm gone if I let us do this. When I'm gone? Was I planning on trying again? I don't know. 

"Marinette? I'm sorry I probably shouldn't have done that, do you want me to go?" Chat sat up in a hurry to leave but stopped as soon as I whimpered, the bed shook from his movements and while I had forgotten that I was in a tremendous amount of pain while Chat was kissing me it all rushed back to me as pain rushed through my entire body. I cried out in pain,

"Shit, Marinette I am so sorry I forgot I'm sorry. I should leave I keep hurting you." I couldn't stop Chat as he climbed out the window and I was left to think about that kiss. That amazing kiss with that beautiful Chat. What do I do now?