The Bad Batch - One shots

I'm okay (I'm not)

A/N: So, this was something that my sister's boyfriend and I thought of. We thought it would've been cool for the second Bad Batch episode to focus more on Cut and how he feels as a deserter. This is also my first time combining different tenses in one piece, so I hope I haven't caused utter confusion. Enjoy!

T/W: Executions

///

Sometimes, Cut feels like he's trapped in a warzone, and he imagineshaving to face the consequences of deserting.

///

As much as he loves and misses his brothers, Cut finds it hard when they visit. Well, harder than usual.

He's enough of a soldier when it's just Suu and the kids around- always hitting the deck at any loud sound and sleeping with a weapon under his pillow- when he does sleep, that is. His family have grown used to his moments of panic or dissociation, but when he's around the few clones who know of his existence, his behaviours seem to amplify.

A few weeks after Rex returns to his Legion, Cut still can't sleep without lying awake for hours- just thinking about what might happen if the Captain breathes a number of his designation to his superior.

He would wake in the dead of night- likely from a nightmare or just from sensing that something isn't right- and hear the stealthy patter of footsteps outside. Lifting the bottom right corner of the rag used as a curtain in his and Suu's room, Cut will see the white helmets in the distance. They'll attack in a triangular formation; two squads on the east and west- one on the south who hold back whilst the others create a distraction.

He can imagine the chatter against the commlinks- the buzzing excitement of finding a soldier who betrayed them.

"Can we have confirmation this is the deserter's location?"

"Affirmative. Begin your attack; we'll be right behind you."

He'll grab his gun- dusty from months of disuse- and then wake Suu with a hand clamped over her mouth.

"Cut," blinking, he's torn from his vivid imagination. Suu's looking at him across the table, a frown laced in her forehead, "Are you alright?"

Cut swallows hard- following the curve of Suu's lek to distract himself. "I'm fine-" he's not, "Here, Jek, let me get you some more juice."

He feels his wife watch him as he walks back to the small kitchen. The juice is kept in the small fridge that uses a large portion of the generator's power every month. Suu says they don't need the power for much else, and food is more important than any piece of fancy farming equipment.

Cut doesn't mind the extra labour- it keeps him fit, and that could be the difference between life and death for his family if soldiers came to deliver the consequences of his actions.

Suu's eyes would shoot open in the darkness to find her husband lurking over her- keeping her quiet with his hand covering her mouth. He'll only do that as a precaution, then raise a finger to his lips before letting go. They trust each other, after all.

"There's Republic forces here. Take the kids into town. I'll call for you when it's safe."

"What about you?"

"I'll stay." He would touch her cheek, maybe press a kiss to her lips if he feels like he has enough time, "I'll do everything I can to protect this family- until my dying breath."

Then, he would hurry her and the kids out of the back door- telling them to stay low and quiet. After all, the Republic doesn't want them; they're not the traitors. Although they consider themselves married and exchanged some hastily put together vows, there are no official ties between him and Suu.