Malice Grimes

Chapter 4

The door opens again and heavy breathing fills the room my eyes still on my daughter "Lucille." I hear ricks breathless voice before I feel his hands on my arm. Turning my head to face him he looks over my face before looking at the baby wrapped in my arms, turning his head to the blood tipped knife he falls to his hip. The tears reform and my face quickly becomes wet again "I-I'm sorry" I snivel turning my body towards him. Getting on his knees he shakes his head his cheeks wet and his eyes glassy, running his hand down the side of my head he leans his forehead against mine "It's not your fault, it's not your fault" he repeats.

"Let's get you looked at" Rick says softly his hands hovering over my shoulder. Nodding my head I take a shallow breath "Okay" I mumble wiping my chin on my shoulder, trying to stand with my daughter in my arms I wince at the pain but fall back down from my balance. Gently putting me down on the floor rick looks behind him fresh tears falling down his face "Jesse will take her so you can stand up" I shake my head at his words. Not able to form words more sobs rack my body, putting his hand on my face he swallows thickly.

"You'll get her back it's just so you can get up" Jesse assures from the doorway, looking at ricks red eyes I take a deep breath my heavy arms shaking as I hold her out. Feeling the weight leave my arms I almost break down again before rick grabs my face and makes me look at him "Look at me" he orders softly. Nodding I force myself up my foot sliding and my hand landing in my babys blood that dripped from the wound. Pulling my hand up I stare at my red palm "Look at me" rick repeats, my head slowly turns towards him.

Feeling like I'm not even in my body I put my hand on the wall pushing myself up on shaking legs. Another shock of pain from between my legs makes me cry and tightly wrap my arms around his shoulders my breathing heavy as I try to push through the pain. With his arms around my back holding me up I hear a gasp from the doorway, opening my eyes I turn my head and see maggie. She walks in and stands behind me "Can you lift your foot" she asks softly, raising my left foot I hold rick tighter from the movement.

Feeling a soft pair of pants on my legs rick backs up a little bit and moves to my side "My daughter" I speak my voice sounding foreign to my ears. Jesse walks forward and holds my baby out to me, taking her back in my arms I lean against ricks side. Taking small steps my knees tremble with every step, biting my cheek I look at the baby as we slowly move out of the bathroom and into the hall. Grunting softly as I go through the house never taking my eyes off the cold, blue and red baby in my arms.

Shuffling down to the street I notice we're going the opposite direction of the house "Take me home" I order. Rick, maggie and jesse stop "You need to get looked at" maggie objects, shaking my head I pull away and turn around "I'm going to the house" I tell them. Walking down the road with rick beside me and maggie and Jesse behind us I look up when I see a shadow infront of me. Meeting tobins eyes as we walk past I look down at my baby.

Sitting on the floor of our room I hold her in my arms "We can bury her when I'm ready but I want to hold her till then" Rick nods his head at my quiet voice. Kneeling down infront of me he pushes my hair out of my face "They need me" I nod numbly. He leans forward and puts his lips on my forehead "I love you" he whispers before standing up and walking out the door. Sitting on the floor for a couple of moments I stand up, leaning against the wall to get my balance.

Opening the door I shuffle to the bathroom and turn on the sink making sure it's not to hot. Unwrapping the towel I let it fall to the floor as I hold my baby under the stream. Grabbing a washcloth I gently wipe away the dried blood and fluid from her skin my throat constricting as I hold back the tears. Taking my finger lightly over her brow and tiny nose I close my eyes taking a breath. Shutting the water off I grab a dry cloth and wipe the water and excess blood off. Wrapping her in a clean towel I walk out of the bathroom stopping when I see carl looking at the baby in my arms.