Warrior

73

I could barely keep my mind on work as the day went by. At first I hadn't planned on working, but given the way the memories of last night kept bombarding my mind, it became highly necessary for me to work so that I could stay distracted. But that only worked for so long, especially since my eyes kept looking over at Arnav's pillow.

Why the fuck did I even-? And with his shirt on, as well as his fucking watch- like what was I thinking?!

I've never even thought of nor looked at Arnav in that way! Sure, the man is absolutely handsome and a total stunner - especially due to his smile, muscles, and tattoos, but... I mean I'm not attracted to him! I don't... I don't like him like that, I don't think of him like that-

Well, clearly you do since you humped his pillow.

I instantly paused as the thought crossed my head.

No.

No, no, no, no, no!

No. No way!

First of all I was drunk, so shit got all twisted and what not, making me do something as stupid as that! Second of all, like I was saying before the voice in my head rudely interrupted me, I don't think of him like that, nor look at him in some sort of way.

Okay, sure, do I still get a little bugged out when he has his left hand in his pocket? Sure, I mean why hide that beautiful piece of art? Or any of his tattoos for that matter, they're fucking amazing!

Amazing to look at- stop it!

And there's no doubt in my mind that this new one is going to be just as fucking epic! Other than that, sure there was that one time in the park that I was checking him out and had a few brash thoughts-

I wonder what he'd look like if he really did orgasm a truckload of cum- no! Enough!!!

Where the fuck are these thoughts coming from? I don't think like this! I don't-! Fucking hell, have I actually given myself brain damage from the stupid fucking alcohol?!

Oh, shut up with your bullshit! It's just as bullshit-y as the thought that you're 'just friends' with Arnav.

Huh? What-? That's not bullshit! We are friends! We are good friends with trust - I mean no other person but a good friend would do what Arnav does for me when I go through my episodes. The way he's been there for me, the way he's taken care of me - the way he has protected me like he promised he would before we got married, is something that only a really good friend would do!

If that's the case, then I'm a monkey's uncle- shut up!

Shut up! Shut up!! Shut up!!!

Where the fuck did you even come from?!

Suddenly my heart thudded, making my eyes widen. My hand moved over it, the feeling being so... foreign. I mean common sense, I have a heartbeat, I'm not fucking dead or a zombie - duh! But the way it just thudded... it's so strange and... and different.

I really fucked myself up with those tequila shots last night, didn't I? I mean there's this new thought process, my heart acting funny - heck, the fact that I even did what I did last night!

Letting out a groan, I buried my face in my hands.

Why the fuck did I do what I did?!

Peeking up over my hands, my eyes landed on Arnav's pillow. The memories of last night instantly flooded my mind - how I gyrated my hips against his pillow, my right hand toying with my clit while my left hand massaged my tit, though I was imagining that it's was Arnav's hands doing it instead of mine as he kissed me along my neck-

Whoa! Stop it! Back the fuck up! Do not go there-! Or rather, do not go there again!

Okay, let's be rational about this cause that whole thing is bizarre! Bizarre! First of all, how would sweet, innocent, virgin-Arnav have any courage to do that kind of stuff? Huh? Answer that! I mean the man blushes over anything and everything in the blink of an eye! So him getting me off? Him touching a titty? Kissing my neck- pbht!

You must be high off of your ass!

Second of all, Arnav does not even think of me that way - at all! We're just good friends, he's just doing his duty, doing his part! That's fucking it! Sure, he's said that he cares, and it's safe to say that it's been proven to be solid - surprising as it is because I mean why would anyone care for me? But it's become clear that... that he does... and it's very sweet that he does.

Arnav is just a good person. He is the product of good teachings and good raising from Aryan and Shalini Singh Raizada-

Oh great! I've gone back to referring Arnav as Arnav only!

Then again it would be weird to, given that I fingered myself while moaning out his name so- shut up! Shut the fuck up!!!

Fucking hell! Is this the shit I'm going to have to deal with until Arnav... until Arnav comes back?!

Dammit! I couldn't get myself to say his full name! The stupid voice is right!

Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!

Fuck!!!

Like what-? Fuck!

FUCK!!!

Fuck me hard and good with whatever it is you got hiding in your pants Arnav- no, no, no!

No!

No-!

How big could he be?

You fucking-! Well actually, now that you mention it, that's a good question- no! No!!!

Fucking hell, am I really wondering what the size of Arnav's penis is?!

No need to snap, it's just a question.

Fuck you!

Gladly, with Arnav's mystery-sized penis!

What the fuck?!

A loud, frustrated groan escaped my lips and I shoved everything aside and stood up.

I need to keep myself distracted, I need to keep myself distracted!

I know I made the joke of Arnav's dick size being a 'chote' too, way back then, but-

No! No!! No!!!

I will not hear anymore of these thoughts, I will not have anymore of these thoughts on Arnav's dick size! Be gone demon!

Oh honey, so much denial isn't good for you. But then again this is how it's been going these past few years, making it easy for you to lock this part away.

Huh?

I felt my heart thump once more and I placed my hand over it again. From the corner of my eye, I caught my reflection in the mirror and turned to it. My eyes were wide, filled with confusion and... and a hint of sorrow.

But why? ...am I feeling it towards me?

I... I'm so confused.

~

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