In my heart [Bruno Mars]

Chapter four

P H I L

Today was thanksgiving. The Banks and my family were gathered at my large. The house was filled with laughter, children shrieking, and a James Brown vinyl playing. We ended the night with a little board game, which ended as a gambling night. And of course, Paris was the winner. She always won.

"Damn aunty P, you always winning this monopoly game. I'm done!" Paris' lil cousin, Jerome hissed.

Meanwhile, the guys were continuing their games, I went to the kitchen to help my wife with the cleaning. She was aided by Peyton, aunt Dani and Mrs. B.

"Now that's a real man," Aunt Dani commented as I sweeped the floor.

"Oh baby, you don't have to--"

"Let me," I said.

"Ooou," the women chorused.

"He's gon get it tonight, that's for sure," Peyton side noted and it earned a few giggles.

"Okay, well at least take your suit off and everything. I don't want you to ruin that suit, it's real nice."

"Okay, mom, okay," I smiled.

I hung my blazer onto a hook inside a walking closet. I loosened my tie and undid the buttons to the wrist of my dress shirt. I was sweating like crazy and Paris noticed.

"Baby, it's okay. Pey and me will take it from here. You go on and rest okay?"

"Are you sure? I mean you cooked all this big meal for us. You must be tired."

She shook her head and gave a faint smile. She cupped my face with her hand, "I'm good."

Downstairs was a disaster. Beer cans littered the floor.

"Oh c'mon y'all, this isn't cool," I said as I picked a few cans. "Mr. B, tell em."

But Mr. Banks didn't move his eyes. He was focused on his cards and the dices. My cousins were playing pool. I was an invisible wall and my voice was unheard due to the booming music. I sighed as I cleaned around before going into my office upstairs.

I kept a few bottles of vodka under the bed and grabbed one to pour a glass. I was sitting next to the night stand, looking at the huge glass framed window. Dazed, I watched as the crystal flakes made their fall onto the ground. My train of thoughts were disturbed by the notification ringtone of an iphone. Paris' Iphone. Curiosity led me to unlock her phone. Five text messages from a number I knew all too well which ended with 6576. Bruno.

From:1-884 543 6576
Time sent: 9:36 PM

Happy thanksgiving, Paris.

From:1-884 543 6576
Time sent: 10:30 PM

I know you're mad at me, but I just wanna let you know that I never stopped loving you. Can we talk over it for some coffee some time next week?

From:1-884 543 6576
Time sent: 10:36 PM

Alright, sounds like a plan. We can meet at Mel's drive-in. It's less crowded.

From:1-884 543 6576
Time sent: 10:57 PM

Have a good night, sweetness. I love you.

The fuel in me began to boil as I tightened my grip onto the phone. My nostrils flared. I tried to keep my cool when I took a sip of my drink. My fingers that were once jittery, remained still and my heart rate that was once accelerating, was beating at normal speed. I drank until I felt numb. Until I forgot about those text messages and it worked.

P A R I S

"Alright you guys, thanks so much for coming. It was a real pleasure having you all come over, really. Thank you mom, dad, aunt Dani, Mr and Mrs. Lawrence."

"No problem baby girl," Daddy hugged. "Make sure you guys come on Christmas."

"Have a good one, alright?" Mr. Lawrence said.

I nodded and waved goodbye. It was just Philly, Pey and me in this big lifeless mansion now. My family and and Phil's always brought life up in here and now that they were gone I felt a little depressed so I asked Pey to sleep over.

"Man, that was one heck of a dinner," I smiled.

Peyton was still muching on some leftover inside the kitchen.

"Damn...you still eating?"

"Midnight snack, girlfriend," she licked her fingers. "Damn boo, what spices did you put? This one's fire."

"Okay, love. I think that's enough for you for today. You really need to watch your weight. You don't wanna end up like--"

"Shut up. " she cut.

She never liked it when I brought up her dark past. Peyton had a large corpulence but fought the weight off with my help. She was that fat friend.

"Then, you know what to do. C'mon, give it to me."

She pouted and tossed the foil plate aside.

"Atta girl," I encouraged.

"You are so going to pay for this, Banks. Just watch."

"Whatever, you'll thank me later. You always do."

I placed the plate inside the fridge and other containers of food. She helped with wiping the counter.

"Let me check on my hubby," I winked at Pey as I climbed the stairs. "We'll talk in the morning."

The only source of power on was the night stand illuminating the bedroom. Phil was in his office, sleeping awkwardly onto his office chair. I caressed his head and removed his framed glasses. He flinched at my first touch.

"Babe,come sleep in bed." I whispered in his ear but all I received in response was a light push. "Baby please, I know you're tired."

He was still asleep. I let out an exasperated sigh and undid the buttons of his dress shirt and left him in his white singlet. I heard my Iphone buzz. I searched for it under the pillow of my matrimonial bed, where I knew I last put it to realize that it was moved somewhere else. Phil's office desk. Confused, I slowly hauled for the phone and lowered the volume.

From:1-884 543 6576
Time sent: 12:49 PM

You asleep yet?

I looked over at Phil and bit my lower lip. I sat my phone back under my pillow, unwilling to answer back. I took a quick shower and wore my childish onesies. I was still a child at heart, y'all, everybody is once in a while.

Phil was awake when I changed into my pyjamas. He was contemplating the glass in his boxers and white singlet, sipping on that glass of alcohol, leisurely.

"Baby, are you good?" I asked.

Silence.

Perhaps he did not hear me.

"Babe-"

"We haven't done it, in a while, have we?" He said still looking at the glass. "I wonder why."

My palms were sweaty, my eyes looked sideways and I bit my lower lip. What could be possibly going on in that mind of his? He looked over his shoulder, partially looking at me. His forehead creased as he cautiously faced me. He looked at me from head to toes in mock horror. I couldn't help but shrug and let out a soft and innocent laughter which we shared afterwards.

"You never cease to amaze me, you know that right." he concluded as he laid a hand beneath my chin. He softly rubbed his thumb against it.

"It's what I do,'' I smirked.

His lips fell onto mine. Our tongues twined as we inhaled both the smirnoff breath of his and the crest toothpaste that I had just used to brush my teeth. Yet, we still didn't make love. Phil fell asleep right after I stripped my onsies down. So much for him, getting it tonight.