Wild Magic Four: The Light Beyond Constellations- a M/M fantasy romance

11- Death and Nightmares

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GRIFFIN—

The dark, blurry mindlessness had nearly overwhelmed me when I had seen River's body in Cain's arms. Being held to the cat's chest like he belonged there. Like he wasn't mine; like I had failed him completely.

Because I had.

I had sworn to myself that I would keep him safe and get him home whole, and he nearly died alone on a cold stone floor in a prison cell.

I was the worst thing possible for him. I had known this. I had tried to fight everything that we were, and this was what happened when I gave in. My mate, my beautiful, sweet mate, was covered in filth and nearly dead because of his mere association with me.

The healer moved and danced around me. He rubbed foul looking poultices and potions into River's skin, working with a grace and confidence that showed his true expertise in his field. Only when he looked up at me, watching him with barely contained violence, and smiled, tightly but with a drawn out nod, did I take a breath that wasn't clipped and forced.

"He's going to be alright," the healer whispered, for the sake of the other men surrounding the cell. I saw Cain take a deep, relieved breath and clutch his mate to his chest tightly.

"I forced him," I bit out, pushing myself up and away from River with what felt like every bit of my strength. My bear, weak and exhausted, fought me every step away from River, but I pushed him down until I feared I may never be able to drag him back out again, even if I ever had the proti collar removed from around my neck.

"What are you talking about?" Cain asked, the tilting of his head so reminiscent of the cat I knew was his second form.

"I forced him to come with me," I announced, annoyed that I had to voice the words in so much detail. Why couldn't he have just understood, when I was giving him back his man, his friend, his employee, and leaving myself alone and in darkness yet again? "I told him that if he didn't come with me, I would kill you, the Emperor, whoever I could get my claws into. He had no choice."

"You're lying," the Emperor stated without hesitation or inflection, his words biting into my skin and making me want to draw my claws on him. What the fuck did he know? Why did he sound as if we were discussing the weather or a horse race over tea, rather than the man who had stolen my heart and soul with nothing but a smile and a kiss?

"I'm not. I—"

"— We know you're lying," Cain cut in, and I growled low in my throat at being cut off mid-sentence, and at his denial of the words I'd torn from my heart to try to protect my mate. "He's your mate," he finished with a shrug. "And I'm pretty certain he feels something for you. I saw it in his eyes when he chose you that day."

"He didn't choose me. He had no... I gave him no choice—"

"— You would deny your mate his rightful choice, his fate? You would take that from him?" Cain hissed, finally tearing his eyes from River and the healer and glaring over at me. He and I were near the same height, though he was at least fifty pounds heavier than I and it was all a bulk of muscle. But I knew, too, just as he did, that without the anti-magic holding me back, my bear could tear his cat to shreds.

I froze at his words, shaking my head to try to clear it. Gods, when was the last time I slept? When had I eaten last? Why was the cell around me spinning, and my legs feeling like the veins were suddenly filled with air and lead all at once?