night talks with -bambinotfound

#19 - hi

i wanna rant cause i feel like caca

-

damn now i dont even know what to say, i feel awful I've been bashed on sent hate gotten called things in past months that keep surrounding my brain and make it hard to sleep at night.

i feel like a shitty person, misunderstood but everytime i try to explain i get talked over.

my eating problems are back.

i feel like if i killed myself nobody would be effected. And I feel like if I did it would be much better for the people I know.

I've never debated it more in my life then now.

Its like I'm on a constant downfall, that in just too problematic. Nobody enjoys my company anymore, I cant even remember the last time ive been told anything nice.

Its constant insult after insult.

Like I'm just a walking book of hate. And whenever I say something nasty about someone (mostly in a joking manor) they always go "why do you always insult me? If youre not gonna ve nice to me, leave." Even though they return the same negative energy to me, not in a joking way.

And nobody ever leaves me alone for a fucking minute. I just want to be alone, by myself, where I can feel safe.

But, someones always bothering me.

...

im not good for anything.

im a burden, im here to be a bitch.

to ruin peoples lives.

damn, i really feel like travis from sally face, there without a purpose, shitty life, no back story.

a bitch.

lol bye