Seven

five: puberty

unfabulous fivever^^

this dedication is to @sadiesoyeah and my joint account; we are in the midst of developing a story!! when it comes out i will tell you! i hope you read it!

One of the most pivotal moments of your middle school life will be when you get your (gasp) period. I know, I just went out there and said it. I'm crazy. People might say puberty isn't that bad, but trust me when I say that's a huge understatement.

Needless to say, most girls get their thingy during sometime in middle school. The majority will probably seventh graders, but I got mine in sixth grade. With blood pouring out of your body, something terrible is bound to happen.

We were on a fieldtrip to Monterey, and the bus driver stopped at a place to go pee. I didn't think I'd have to go, but I got off anyways just in case. When I went to the bathroom, I saw my underwear and I was like "Holy crap! I got my thing!"

I ran to tell my friend Madison. She left her pads on the bus and so did I, so we had to go tell the male bus driver what had happened. That was mortifying. We ran off the bus, which was slowling filling up with kids, and went to the bathroom. Old people were taking forever to pee, and I needed to put a pad on. I waited for five minutes and ran in front of this old lady and almost knocked her over, but hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.

"Madds!" whisper-shouted Madison. "The bus is full. People will be wondering where we are!"

"I'll be out in a moment!" I replied and unlocked the stall. I washed my hands as quickly as possible and ran to the bus, where basically everybody knew what had happened because we had watched the 'video' last year.

Some boys were completely oblivious and had no idea what was going on. For that I am truly grateful.

Jackson and Alex knew what was going on and laughed and teased me. I finally said "Until your vagina is a bloody waterfall, shut the hell up." I don't like to use those words, but I did what I needed to do.

Periods only get worse, my darlings. I've thrown up, cried, screamed, had excruciating headaches, terrible cramps, periods that seemed like they'd never end, pains everywhere, and the need for chocolate. It's part of life. I know that it simply isn't fair, but being a girl comes with more trials and tribulations than being a man.

Even though I'm pretty young, getting pregnant doesn't sound all that bad (omg, I sound hecka slutty). You don't have a period for nine whole months, and the you get to have a super adorable baby. If you breastfeed the baby, you also won't have a period.

The worst part about having a period is pads. Also when you sneeze. That really sucks, too. But I cannot stand pads. They are the most uncomfortable things on the earth and if they were a person I would block them on Instagram. And tampons suck too, but they're way better than pads. It doesn't feel like a diaper. At first it's painful, but you've got to get over it. I don't want a bloody diaper!

Another thing that really sucks is getting the mood swings. People that I usually find hilarious or just want to be around all the time just aren't good enough. I want to murder Iggy Azalea because she is my blond, big bootyed, hot twin sister.

This sounds really random, but when I'm on my period, sometimes I truly consider having that lipo-fat-transfer thing where they do lipo, and then they pump the fat into your butt or boobs. Another thing I would like to say about being a girl is "DANG YOU, DAD, AND YOUR X CHROMOSOMES, TOO!" (Thanks, seventh grade science. Now I have a scapegoat for periods)

For those of you who haven't got your period yet, you are truly blessed. Even thugh periods are probably the worst thing about puberty, you also have to shave, and when people hit your boobs it hurts. And you have acne and you smell bad. There's all of these different things and they all suck. Seventh grade, in my opinion, just isn't as enjoyable as people make it out to be.

Sorry guys for the rant! I was on my period while i wrote this and its just a hate letter to puberty. but for realsies, dang you puberty. sorry for the crappy chapter guys, nothing funny or worth writing about happened this week. hope ya understand!! AND THANK YOU FOR OVER 300 READS!! I AM TRULY BLESSED AND SURPRISED BY THAT!!!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

madds