My friend, Demise

Chapter 1

Im low on patience and empathy, given I'm 17 and I've got a big mouth. It's hard for me to bite my tongue or hold back from starting fights with everyone I know.

My mother thinks that I have trouble with managing my anger, but I disagree. I handle it just fine.

I wiped the blood from my nose.

Mostly fine.

I have no problem knowing that any of my friends don't see me as a "BFF". I'm the kind of person you keep around as a second option. Kind of like a side bitch.

My therapist thinks I start fights because I don't get treated well enough that home and I want more attention. Even if it's bad attention. I don't believe that either. I've only just now started to realize how much I enjoy the attention I get when I'm beating someone to a pulp because of a simple bad look my way.

It's like there's a ticking clock inside my head at all times. When people start to influence me in any way at all, whether it be talking to me or even glancing my way, that clock ticks faster. The more they bother me, the louder that clock gets. The louder it gets, the less patience I have. The only way to make the ticking stop is to take out my frustration.

"You need to learn how to be patient with people." My therapists words echoed in my head, which made the clock tick faster.

"Shut up you old hag!" I shouted out, kicking my foot into the lamppost beside me. I realized that was a mistake quickly, grabbing ahold of my foot and hopping on one leg as I yelled in pain. "Ow! Fuck!"

Every sound in my world is amplified due to the silence. Every footstep, every ticking clock in every classroom, every pen that clicks or drops tot he floor, every little sharp sound is so loud in my head that it pisses me off.

I also don't do well under pressure, but I'm always trying so hard to calm down that it puts me under even more pressure.

I only know two emotions and have my whole life. I've only ever been those two. I don't get sad, I don't feel happy or exited. I'm either angry or unbearably lonely.

I'm grade school, some kids thought I was the devil. I'm not. I'm just....I'm just different. So don't go around thinking I'm some kind of demon, okay?!

"Gah...." My hands hurt so bad. I can barely feel my jaw. I tightened my fists. "That hag."

"Try turning your focus to sounds that only you're making! Since they bother you so much, try to make noise that won't make you loose control like that." My therapist's voice appeared in my mind again.

I obliged though, humming a song as I walked home with blood dripping from my nose like it was a broken water fountain.

"Excuse me!" A short boy with brown hair ran over to me. Well...I say he was short but I'm just too tall for my own good. I'm 6'5. He was probably only 5'11. "Are you all alone out here?"

"Are you trying to pull some shit and kidnap me?" I scoffed. "I'm not into that, you know."

He laughed, which made me flinch. Gross. What's he so happy about? I should wipe the smile off of his dumb little face. The only thing that stopped me from doing so was when he locked eyes with me. His own were a bright shade of grin, speckled with shades of yellow and blue near the center. "Not at all! Just curious. I've never seen you around here before, did you just move?"

"I've lived here my whole life." I rolled my eyes, growing annoyed when he began to walk alongside me.

My hair is black, wavy, and down to my chin with choppy and overgrown bangs that I'm way too lazy to cut. I usually keep it typed back in a bun or ponytail so it's not in my face. But after fights, I leave it down to hide any marks that may get me in trouble back home. "That makes two of us. Why haven't I seen you?"

"Nothing worth looking at."

"I highly disagree. You'd be quite a catch if you wiped the blood off of your face and maybe did something with yourself hair. Cut your nails too....they're so jagged. Do you bite them?"

The ticking grew faster.

"Shut up, you look like a fucking midget from my point of view. I could squash you like a bug."

"But you won't."

"What makes you think that?"

"Well aside from your intimidating voice and that crazy sexy height you've got..." He stepped in front of me and held up a hand, making me stop. "I think we'll be good friends!"

"I don't like friends."

"Looks like I'll have to change that."

"Go home, Perv." I walked past him, to which he skipped alongside me again.

"So, how's you get the nosebleed? Did someone hit you?"

"Yeah."

"Your parents?"

I stopped in my tracks, the ticking in my head completely going silent. "Do you want to die?" I shot a glare his way, causing goosebumps to rise on his skin.

"Not really."

"Then shut up and leave me alone or that's how you'll end up." I shoved him aside. "Stay out of my business."