OK, fine.

ok, things? different.

I was struck today, about how much more different things are today, then bfor.

I'm currently spending the night at a friend's house with another friend, the three of us haven't hung out like this in like forever. And by like forever i mean a few months, Actualy.. probably close to a year or more.

It was.. uneventful to say the least, wai passed out almost immediately, Jeremy walked around a bit we played a card game, then he passed out too.

This was a few hours ago. I'm used to being up after everyone, but.. something struck me as a tinge.. different. I started pacing with my music like i do, and i thought about things.

How everything's so simalir and yet, so different. I'm different, they're different, we're all different...

Jeremy is so confused and jaded now...

He used to be rather lovable, good, complacent, optimistic, spirited, you know the type. He was happy, and life was good. He didn't like doing much physical things, preferred to just chill. He loved his friends, and did his best to keep everyone happy. he always did what he felt was right.

But now? He's so confused, and paranoid. He's salty and jaded. He's annoyed and tired. He isn't happy, though his life is still good, mostly.. he still isn't the physical type, still likes to chill,though he's never really chill anymore.. he doesn't care about making anyone happy anymore, to be honest, i don't think he really thinks he has any friends anymore. He doesn't trust anyone, he's barely involved, and just wants everyone to leave him alone.. he doesn't care about what's right anymore, he's so filled up with wai's Machiavellian outlook, the definition of right and wrong just stopped existing for him, only selfish thoughts of wants versus others wants, and what's good for himself.

What happened? Most of his friends left, nothing tragic or bad, simply grown up, moved on, got lives, left him behind. This alone wouldn't have been too too bad, except this was coupled with kaylyn's shenanigans. The shite she's pulled on everyone is enough to write a story, so perhaps ill list all that another time. For now though? We'll just say she broke his heart. Destroyed his ability to trust. Crippled his life. I'd love to say I'm over exaggerating, but sadly I'm not, she's done more bad than anyone I've ever known, and he took the Brunt of it. Everyone warned him, but he just kept forgiving her, kept letting her hurt him again. He's a sweetheart, And refused to see the bad in her until the pain she caused, became so bad he couldn't ignore it. He's still recovering, but he'll never be the same...

Sigh...

Wai is different as well...

He used to be rather the intellectual. Well i say that, you'd never known by looking at him. He didn't look the part at all, he actually cane across as a juvenile youth. The kinda immature attitude and look, cliche to expectations. And yet, he was extremely smart, in fact, college for him was free. he passed a few tests impressed enough people, They just flat out paid for him entirely. Me and him used to have the most ridiculous conversations lol, we'd talk philosophy, religion, psychology, economics, politics, you name it. We'd completely lose Jeremy heh.. Jeremy could barely follow what's going on, but Jeremy didn't care, just happy people were happily talking. Wai was a stubborn one though, never willing to lose an argument even when he decided he ws wrong. He did what he wanted, but cared about his own, you know?

But now? Well he's just as stubborn now lol. Though we rarely talk anything fancy, he's more obsessed with studying me at this point :/. See, i invalidate his views now. He's grown to become quite the er.. asshole. He's barely passing college classes, not because they're hard or anything, he just doesn't study or try. He spends most his time drinking, or doing drugs. Which drugs? I can't name any he hasn't done actualy. Well.. i don't think he's done meth? But that's about it. To be fair, my knowledge of drug types is basically nonexistent lol. Either way, he also, as i said bfor, become quite the asshole.