Without Him [Victuuri Fanfic]

Chapter 5

My eyes were greeted by a gentle morning light as I opened them, and for the first time in a while, I felt warm and comfortable. This was all thanks to the man who was still asleep on my chest, holding me just as tightly as he had the night before. Victor looked so peaceful, so perfect when he slept. There wasn't a touch of distress in his flawless face, and his broken eyes were finally getting some rest.

I couldn't resist the temptation to stroke his hair, it had become as comforting for me as it was for him. His hair was always so soft, was I expected to not touch it?

I admired Victors face while I could, before it could be creased by any unpleasant thoughts. The morning sun illuminated his face, giving him an angelic glow. I couldn't look away.

My hand froze as Victor's fingers gripped my waist for a moment, and his legs shifted beneath the blankets. He mumbled incoherently, but didn't open his eyes. I prayed that I hadn't woken him up from his slumber, which he desperately needed.

"Yu... mhm..." he murmured. I pushed a stray hair off of his forehead to find his sleek eyebrows furrowed. "Mi... ss... hm..." he continued, clutching my waist once again.

Miss him?

Victor began to stir restlessly, his disjointed rambling becoming more clear. "I... mhm... iss..." he whimpered as if something were upsetting him. "Hm... dah... d..."

What was he trying to say? Whatever he was experiencing was disturbing him, so I recommenced the caressing of his hair. His mumbling stopped for a moment, and his face twisted in confusion.

"Yu... ri?" He inquired, burying his cheek into my chest. "Yu...?" he asked again.

"Shhh," I cooed, "it's okay." I held his head close to my sternum to comfort him. "You're okay..."

After squeezing my body once more, Victor's eyes opened slightly. His pupils adjusted to the light in the room, but they didn't focus on the sheets before them. He stared thoughtlessly into the air without moving. He didn't blink, his eyes didn't shift.

It was a little unsettling to watch.

After another moment of stillness, his eyelids fell heavy over his gaze, and he was peaceful once again. He didn't mumble or stir; his body was idle. I gently released a breath that I didn't realize was trapped in my lungs. He was asleep again.

I kept his head pressed against my chest, now stroking his hair with a single thumb. I stared at the ceiling, listening to his steady breathing. It could've been hours, just lying there in tranquility. My mind wasn't plagued with worried thoughts — that was new — and the only thing I concerned myself with was the present.

Was Victor dreaming? What was he dreaming about? Was it a good dream? Was he happy? Did he know I was there with him? Did he even remember last night? He was so exhausted, I wouldn't be surprised if he'd forgotten. Was he going to be okay?

One of Victor's hands removed itself from my body to grip the blankets. I felt the weight on my chest lighten as his head was lifted up. He felt the blankets and stared at them as if he'd never seen them before.

He didn't know where he was.

"Hey, Victor," I murmured, and his head whipped around to face me. His eyes were wide with panic. "Hey, it's okay, it's just me..." I softened my voice as much as I could.

He stared at me for a moment before hiding his face in the blankets that covered my body. "Sorry, Yuri... I'm sorry," he chuckled a little as he apologized.

It was the first time I heard him laugh. It had also been a while since I heard his morning voice, and... uh... damn.

"It's okay," I replied, "don't apologize."