Dear Perrie

Chapter 4

"So what about us?" I asked.

"Well it's been a while since we've last spoken or even seen each other.." she began.

"Yes I'm aware of that."

"Well I just don't want things to be awkward you and I. Also I don't want there to be a problem between you and Zayn."

"Why would there be a problem between Zayn and I?"

"I'm not saying that there is. I'm only saying that because you and I were a thing in the past and now that I'm with Zayn again I just want to be sure that you're okay with that."

"Of course I'm okay with that. It wouldn't matter if I was or not anyway. It's your happiness. On top of that you invited me here so I wouldn't really have a say on who else is living here." I said. Of course I had a problem with her dating Zayn. It bothered me like crazy, but what was I supposed to do? Tell her who and who she couldn't date. If I remember correctly it's my fault she and I aren't together and it's my fault I'm not living the life I want to with her. I can not blame anyone but myself.

"Well I'm glad you're okay with it." she almost as if it was a big relief.

"Of course I'm okay with it. If anything I couldn't be happier for the two of you." I said. Everything coming out of my mouth was a lie.

"Well goodnight." she said. She gave me a quick hug and walked out of the room closing the door behind her.

The room that I'd be staying in for a while was small and the walls were painted a light blue, a pretty color, but not something I would choose myself. It had a small tv and a closet. It was nothing major, but it was free and better than nothing.

That night I laid in bed thinking of all the things that went wrong. What if I never would of met that guy? Maybe Perrie and I would still be together. As of now I was in Perrie's house and I had no idea where he was. He was probably with some other girl right now, but that didn't matter. What mattered now was restoring a friendship. Although I wanted Perrie again as my own, I knew it was a little to late for that and I would have to live with the fact that I ruined things for myself.

Then again I could always try and get Perrie back, but that would never work. So as of tonight my mission has become to get Perrie back. Not sure how that will work out for me, if it even will work out, but I will figure something out and maybe just maybe I'd be able to call Perrie mine again.

The next morning I woke up pretty early and the house was still very quiet. My guess was that I was the first one awake. I got out of bed and made my way to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and took a quick shower. I put my hair into a pony tail and went downstairs. When I walked into the kitchen I heard a humming sound and saw Perrie standing there in front of the stove making breakfast. For a moment I just stood there admiring her body. Her curves, that was until she looked back and caught me staring.

"Good morning." she said with a smile.

"Morning." I replied taking a seat at the small kitchen table.

"Sleep well?"

"Yea. I'd like to thank you again for letting me stay. It means a lot."

"Oh it's no problem. I hope you're hungry."

"Actually yea I'm starved."

"Well breakfast is almost ready. Mind pulling out two plates?" she asked and I nodded and stood up walking to the cabinets where the plates were. I took two out wondering if Zayn would be joining us.

"Thank you." she said as I put the plates on the table.

"Where's Zayn?" I ask.

"Oh he left early for work." she said and I nodded.

When we had begun eating converstaion was small, things such as how have things been and if anything is new. I had one question on my mind, but I couldn't quite pull myself to ask so I sat there in silence hoping Perrie would continue in converstation.

"So what did you do for the second year of college?" she asked.

"I actually stood there, what about you?"

"Oh I came home and went somewhere a little closer. Although it was nice in the states I couldn't bare another year being that far away from home."

"Understandable. I haven't seen any friends or family for the past few years. After college I went straight to work in New York."

"Hm lovely. How was it there?"

"It was nice. Different, but I liked it."

"That's good. I thought it was hard to get a job there quickly."

"It is. Just as hard as it is anywhere, but I qualified and they wanted me to fill the spot."

"So what brought you out here?"

"Well the promotion." I said stating the obvious.

"Well yea I know about the promotion, but what made you want to come back to England? I thought you'd wanted to be somewhere like New York."

"New York had always been a dream of mine and I always told you about that. When I first got there it was incredible I thought it was just like the movies had portrayed. For a while it was just like the movies. Lots of fun, places to see, things to do, but once you've basically done and seen everything it's nice to just come back home. I do love New York, but I wouldn't want to live there again."

"Oh understandable." she said with a nod and continued eating. I continued eating as well unsure of how to carry this conversation. I could either ask the question that I was so eager to ask or just keep it to myself.

For a moment I remembered what I told myself I'd do last night. I was going to get Perrie back no matter what and asking this question would help me more than anything. So here I was about to ask my ex-girlfriend who was now with someone else how she still felt about me.

"So Perrie.." I began

"Yea?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Of course. What's on your mind?"

"Well I've been wondering did you ever think of me while we weren't together?"

"Honestly yea I did all the time. I thought about you more than anything." she said.

"Can I ask you something else?"

"Sure."

"Do you still love?"

Okay I'm so sorry guys that this update took so long. I've been so busy with school and I've also had some writers block, but here is another chapter and hopefully I'll have another up this weekend.

Anyways vote and comment. It'd mean a lot if you commented what you thought of this chapter so it helps me know how to make the next better. Anyway I love you guys and thanks for being so patient with me.