Healing Nature

2. A High Bar

At the Legion of Doom Scarecrow and Bane were stood in the break room engaged in conversation.

"Oh, crazy about Joker and Harley. I heard they tried an open relationship thing, which everybody knows only works for gay men."

"Your idle gossip distracts me from my master plan. Break the Batman. Punish Gotham for its transgressions, and stand atop the mountain of skulls left in my wake." Bane says as he stirs a spoon in his coffee cup.

"Anyway, I heard Harley..." Scarecrow starts but the Joker walks in at that moment. 

"Morning." Joker says as he walks into the break room and begins making his own coffee. 

 "How are you?" Bane asks. 

"Fine. Why wouldn't I be?" Joker asks frowning.

"Because Harley dumped you. You know?" Scarecrow says hesitantly as one of Joker's eyes twitches for a moment.   

"People are saying that Harley dumped me?" Joker asks before he begins to laugh. "Please! You know what? I don't even care. I wish her well." Joker says but his hand shakes with rage as he sips his coffee. 

Meanwhile at Ivy's apartment Harley was sat on the couch watching the television. 

 "Ivy, Y/n, no rush, but Howie Mandel's only showing how to turn Thanksgiving leftovers into an entire nativity scene." Harley calls out to the two.

Ivy was in the nearby kitchen making coffee for herself and Harley "Oh, my God! Wait, what?" Ivy says excitedly as she quickly picks up the two mugs and rushes back to the couch. "Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot." Ivy says before setting them down on the coffee table.

Y/n enters the room now. 

"Who is this Howie Mandel?" He asks Harley.

"Only like the greatest talk show host on Tv right now." Harley replies but Y/n raises his brow still confused.

"Come on watch it with us and you'll totally get it." Harley says. Y/n walks to the couch now as he remains standing nearby but he turns his attentions to the Tv in front of three. 

 "Next, I'm gonna show you how to make a mashed potato Virgin Mary." The man known as Howie on the Tv says but he looks nervous as he visibly sweats. "But first, please welcome my, uh, surprise co-host. Uh, you know him as the clown prince of crime. Let's give it up for the Joker!" Howie says and the studio audience gasps as the Joker walks onto the screen now. 

"Shit!" Harley cries out.  

"Damn it." Ivy says annoyed. 

"Oh dear..." Y/n comments sensing trouble.  

"Ooh." Frank the house plant says sensing drama coming up.

 "Get ready, America. Howie's got something he's dying to tell you." Joker jokes as he takes off Howie's apron to reveal a bomb strapped to him underneath.  

"Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Not Howie!" Frank the Plant says worried now.

"You know what's stupid?" Howie says as he begins reading from a card. "Me, for playfully implying on yesterday's show that the celebrity villain couple, formerly known as "JoQuinn" is no more."  

"Thanks, Howie. When I dumped poor, sad, what's her name..." Joker says. 

"She's right over here." Frank the plant cries out pointing to Harley sat on the couch.