Forever Mine

Chapter 39

WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT
Self harm/suicide content

Liam was playing his game of ignoring me.  It had only been the afternoon since everything happened but he hadn't come out of his office. I hated when he did this. It made me miss him. It made me long for his attention. When he played these games with me, I couldn't handle it. I was already alone enough. By him ignoring me it just made me feel even more alone. I bet he would cave this time. He's weak. I see it in his eyes. The way I didn't flinch when he yelled or run away from him. He's loosing his power. I am not letting him break my spirits. He would have to talk to me eventually. New Year's Eve was coming up. I am sure we would be getting together with everyone. He couldn't ignore me then.

By the end of the day I was feeling like shit. Being 5 months pregnant with two was not fun. I felt like crap. My feet were swollen, my back was killing and I had felt like I was going to throw up.

Being pregnant was supposed to be fun. Telling your husband, telling family and friends, having a gender reveal. Packing the hospital bag, getting pictures taken. All of that was ripped away from me. I never even got that chance. All because of one selfish ass bastard. I began to cry.

I don't think I even want to have kids after this. Not after all the pain and trauma this pregnancy has caused.  What if I didn't love Wren and Liliah? Because of him? What if they looked just like him? It was all becoming too much.

I watched the crimson seep out. I let out a breath through pursed lips. I couldn't believe I had resorted to this. I felt sick to my stomach seeing the blood. I went too far. What was I doing? I had two children to deliver. I could't let them down. What if the cut had gone to deep? I began to sob. The adrenaline was pumping through my veins. The blood began to drip to the ground. Before I knew what I was doing I made another cut into my arm. Just enough to hurt me but not enough to kill me. It was addicting. The pain. The rush. Something to take my mind off the sick reality. It was a way of coping. I couldn't take the thought of living here anymore. I just wanted to end it all.... All the thoughts of remorse were gone. I wanted to be selfish. Just this once. I couldn't live like this anymore.

Liam's pov:
I finish making dinner and call Avery down. I was still upset with her but I wasn't going to let her starve. I'm not that much of a monster.

She didn't answer. Has I assumed she wouldn't. She was always so stubborn. I walk up the stairs and to the bedroom. She isn't on the bed but I see the bathroom light on.

"Av? Come down. I made dinner, you have to eat something."

Still no answer. What the hell?

I walk into the bathroom. I feel my heart begin to beat out of my chest. I let out an ear piercing scream.

"AVERY! Oh my god! Avery what did you do!" I cried out.

The blood was seeping out of her wrist. I never thought she would do this. Not again. I couldn't believe this was happening. She had passed out. All the blood. So much blood come from her tiny little wrists. I quickly applied pressure to the wounds. I looked over the rest of the body to see if she had harmed herself anywhere else. Her stomach. Thank god. Just a big round belly. No cuts. I looked at her thighs. I saw the scars. It brought me back to that night. In the house. We were here all over again. This was all my fault.

I gently scooped her up and laid her on the bed. I nudged her trying to wake her.

"Avery please. Please wake up!" I cried.

She needed to wake up. I needed her. I couldn't live without her. I felt her pulse. She was still breathing. The blood began to seep through the gauze. I quickly ran to get more. I began to panic. I didn't know what else to do or who to call. I quickly called Dr. Evans. He would be able to help in some way, right?

Avery's pov:

I wake up feeling light headed. I rub my hand against my forhead and I felt something on my wrist. I looked down and saw it wrapped in white gauze. The spot felt tender. I tried to get up but my other hand was handcuffed to the bed. No no no this couldn't be happening again. Why had he handcuffed me? I had already felt prisoner as it was. I began to cry. I wanted to call out for him but I hated feeling like I had to beg for him.

Suddenly Liz comes running into the room.

"Oh my gosh Avery you're awake. Oh honey." She comes rushing to my side.

I cry into her arms.

"I want to die." I sob.
"Why didn't he let me go." I continue to cry.
"I don't want to be pregnant. I don't want to have his children. I don't want to be married. I don't want to be here. I can't do this Liz. I want to end it all. Why did he handcuff me." I cry even harder.

"Shhh it's ok honey get it all out. Your safe here with me. It's all going to be okay. I'm right here." She continues to soothe me.

"Avery?! You're awake!" Liam cries rushing to my side.

"GET OUT!" I roar.
"GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT!!! I AM ALREADY FUCKING PRISONER ENOUGH! YOU FELT THE NEED TO HANDCUFF ME?!"

He looks panicked.

"Avery please honey it's ok. It was for your own good. I was afraid. I didn't want you to hurt yourself anymore."

"GET OUT! THIS IS YOUR FAULT! WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST LET ME DIE!"

I can feel the anxiety attack coming. I begin to rock back and fourth. Liz is still by my side trying to console me.

"I just want to die." I continue to cry.

Liam rushes over to me and tries to console me. I slam my free hand into his chest.

"If you can do one thing right just leave me alone. I don't want you here." I plead.

Liz looks up at him with pleading eyes.

"Liam please." Liz pleads.

He lets out a sigh and nods. He walks out of the room and closes the door.

For once he finally listened. Why couldn't he listen to my pleas all the other times? He saw how much pain I was in. Why couldn't he just let me go?

Sorry this chapter took a second to get up. This was a bit of a heavy chapter. I hope you guys liked it though. Let me know what you think, comment and vote💕💕💕