Dear Val, (An Outsiders Fanfiction)

{9}

Even if I wanted to have a relationship with Dally, it will always go back to when we broke up. I wouldn't be able to see him for who he is. But ideally your are how you react in troubling times. It makes me wish I never would've had the cancer but I never would've realized what I want can be lost so easily. But this is where it ends. All the pain, all the tears, all the regrets. This is where I shine. But the thing was, he just got me. Dallas Winston understands me like no other person on this planet. And I have to put that behind me. I pulled apart from his embrace.
"Dally we can't go on like this."
"So then we don't have to. Just say the word." He had a pleading look in his eyes.
"But Dally, we won't last."
"Why?"
"Because I will just keep blaming you for random stuff. I don't want to say it but if I must, if you never would've broken up with me, I wouldn't be where I am today. You shattered me, and years later I am still recovering! Dally I'm doing it because you should move on, and so should I. It is hurting me more than is hurting you."
I said and he sighed.
"If it's for the best." He said and walked into the house. I swear a tear swept down his cheek, but he viciously wiped it away. I sat down on the steps, my face in my palms.
"Are you okay Val?" Johnny said walking to where I was.
"No." I murmured.
"What was that?"
"Yes I'm fine."
"You said no the first time." He sat down beside me.
"Johnny I can't deal with it!" I said sobbing into my hands. "I hurt Dallas Winston!"
"I know but it won't get any better when you're crying about it. It had to happen sometime right?" He said hugging me.
"Yeah. I guess you're right. Thanks Johnny." I said hugging him back.
"Come on, let's go inside. Plus, he would love to see you." He whispered the end.
"He who?"
"Oh shoot! Pretend I didn't say that!" He said and rushed me inside.
Did someone in the gang like me?