Just Breathe

Chapter Fifteen

Lia didn't mind seeing her therapist, and honestly found that she really was helpful. She was quite surprised and frankly annoyed, however, when her mother had informed her Thursday morning of a new appointment that afternoon. Usually she saw Dr. Sanders once a month and they'd already met a couple weeks ago. Why they were meeting again was beyond her.

"And what if you don't get into MIT?" Dr. Sanders posed, noticing her client's right heel moving up and down rapidly. "How do you think you'd handle that?"

Lia glanced at the clock on the wall for the fourth time in the 15 minutes she'd been there. She didn't have time for this today. Why hadn't her mother asked her if she had time for this today? Lia had so much to do that evening. Her SAT retake was in two days and she had an exam the next day, plus regular homework. Lia didn't really have a choice since she was still on thin ice with parents after the party debacle.

She sighed and examined her chewed up fingernails. "I don't know," she replied, disinterested. "You know me. I'd probably crawl into a hole and die."

Dr. Sanders cocked her head to the side and watched her client. She sometimes tried to use humor to dispel real feelings, but it tended to be when she was in a bad place, as her mother suspected.

"And what do you think that would do for your life?" She posed.

Lia rubbed at her eye, exhausted and absolutely not in the mood to have conversations about theoretical life events.

"Can we..." she started, then stopped, letting her hand fall loudly into her lap. "Can we not do this today? I'm sorry. I know my mom called and everything and she made me come but I am up to my ears in homework and SAT prep-"

Having seen Lia for years now, Dr. Sanders knew her client's emotional tells pretty well. She was fidgety and her fingernails were a mess. Just as Vanessa had reported over the phone, it seemed like Lia was on the verge of a breakdown. Add the break up of a three year relationship to the pressures of senior year at a highly competitive school and a famous father and it was a recipe for a meltdown.

Lia began to get up but Dr. Sanders asked her to sit back down firmly but kindly. As a therapist the last thing she wanted was to talk to a client then have her immediately go off the deep end.

"Lia, we can stop but first I need you to take a deep cleansing breath," she instructed her calmly. Lia sighed, rested her back against the couch, and closed her eyes, deciding to pacify her therapist. The quicker she could get this done she faster she could get home and dive into her work.

"In through your nose," she continued slowly. "Out through your mouth. Good. Keep going."

Lia began to reluctantly relax. She couldn't remember the last time she'd just sat on a couch with her eyes closed and breathed. As a student in the age of multitasking, she almost felt guilty whenever she sat without doing anything.

The next thing she sensed was a hand on her shoulder, gently shaking her awake.

"Lia?" Dr. Sanders called her name quietly. Lia gasped in surprise and picked up her head. She'd fallen asleep. She'd fallen asleep?

Lia looked up at Dr. Sanders in a panic. "I fell asleep?!" She asked, incredulous. "You let me sleep?"

Dr. Sanders sat back down on her couch. "Seems like you needed it."

Lia looked at her like she was nuts. She was a professional and she just let her sleep through her session? She'd begged to be able to leave because she had so much work to do and now she'd wasted forty-five minutes sleeping!

Lia huffed and reached for her backpack, feeling slightly disoriented. "I didn't have time for this today," she growled, which was completely unlike her. Lia could feel hot tears stinging the back of her eyes. "You should have listened to me and let me leave."