Just Breathe

Chapter Twenty Nine

A few weeks had passed since Lia had danced endlessly with her family in her bedroom in celebration of her acceptance into MIT. Life quickly got busier than usual with the Thanksgiving holiday and the end of the semester rapidly approaching. Not to mention, the changes within the family's schedule. Vanessa had used her researching skills ( along with the recommendation of her well-known psychologist mother-in-law) to get Stella in for a consultation with one of the best therapists in the city who specialized in dance therapy.

Although, in some sense, things were starting to smooth themselves out for the Miranda-Nadal family, Lia felt like her problems were just growing more complicated.

"You said that Thanksgiving with your family went well, though?" Dr. Sanders sat back in her chair as she looked on at her client. Due to schedule conflicts, it was their first session since Lia had arrived back from California and received her MIT acceptance.

"Well, yeah," Lia answered, "We were at my grandparent's place - my dad's parents - and everyone was there. Even some extended family flew in from Puerto Rico. Everyone kept talking about me getting into MIT,"

It wasn't remiss on the therapist that the tone of Lia's voice didn't match her usual demeanor when talking about her top choice school, "What were they saying?"

"How amazing it is and how proud my parents must be. My abuelo kept going on about how if at least ten of them go in on season tickets then they'll get ten percent off." Lia said, shaking her head as her grandfather's booming voice rang through her mind, "Which doesn't even make sense because, in reality, who in my family is really concerned about getting a discount and nobody even likes sports!"

Dr. Sanders gave a small smile. The sarcastic wit of the teenager was something she grew used to during their sessions over the past three years, "It seems like they are all excited for you. Getting into MIT has been your main goal for at least the past year,"

Lia nodded, knowing the statement was true. Getting into MIT had been her only goal. But why did she feel so confused, "I just thought it would feel different. That I would feel different."

The therapist jotted down a few notes onto the bright yellow notepad that was placed in her lap before she spoke up, "Care to elaborate?"

Lia gnawed at her lip, a habit she had had for as long as she could remember, always hating when questions like these arose in her sessions. Wasn't Dr. Sanders getting paid to tell her how to fix her problems? Why did it seem like she always did most of the analyzing?!

Her thoughts drifted back to the day she had received her acceptance letter. The feeling of relief that had washed over her when she knew she had gotten into her dream school. When she knew she was good enough to be accepted. The feeling of accomplishment hadn't gone away - she knew getting in was a big deal. But during the last few weeks whenever the topic of college or MIT, specifically, came up, Lia instantly moved to change the subject. But therapy was supposed to be different.

"Whenever someone starts to talk about me going to MIT next year, it's like my stomach just gets into a bunch of knots," The words flew out of her mouth. She folded her arms around her stomach, "It's like - I was so sure for so long that that's what I wanted and if I didn't get in I wasn't good enough and everyone tried to prepare me of the fact that I might not get in and then I did get in and now...." her voice trailed off as she stopped herself. Her thoughts were going faster than her mouth could speak. She felt a lump growing in her throat.

"Hey," Dr. Sanders said softly as Lia looked at her, "Take a deep breath and we'll work through it together,"

Lia inhaled a breath, closing her eyes as she exhaled. She repeated the action two more times before she felt a bit more steady. When she opened her eyes and looked at her therapist, it was reassuring to be met with a comforting gaze.